Honor, Love and BDSM Polyamourous Fire Fighters
by gyspyqueen7
Summary: Casey, Severide and Olivia are in a serious BDSM relationship together. Follow their relationship as it goes through every road bump imaginable - a lose of control on Matt's part and a breach of trust being one of them. Contains spanking of an adult, BDSM themes, Dom!Casey, Dom!Severide
1. Chapter 1

_This story is assuming a couple of things:_

 _1\. Dawson and Casey aren't together in this- although they are the cutest couple… they aren't together, engaged or otherwise._

 _2\. Severide, Casey and my OC are in a committed BDSM relationship so they have already had the safe/consensual talk before this happens and have been in this relationship for a while. They have established safe words and mostly know each others limits so please don't try this at home kids!_

 _3\. You don't know the OC, she is a figment of my imagination- or of my fantasies! Who doesn't want to extremely hot and sexy fire fighters in a relationship with her?_

 _Okay, with that out of the way, the warnings: this story will contain spanking of an adult, BSDM theme, polyamourous relationship between three people. It will contain non-consensual spanking._

 _I will switch between points of view and between names. I will use Kelly and Severide interchangeably as well as Matt and Casey._

Another crack echoed around the apartment and again I try to wiggle out of Matt's grip in pain. Again, I'm unsuccessful and I feel more tears of red hot shame, anger and misery work their way down my face to drip to the puddle on the ground below me. Okay maybe going into the townhouse without Casey's permission and before Severide and Squad 3 had declared it to be safe had been a dangerous and stupid move on my part that morning- and I had expected a trip over Severide or Casey's knees for it. Yet this intensity and length of spanking was becoming uncalled for. Matt had began the spanking a good half an hour ago and even then I had knew I was in big trouble. The moment he pulled his leather belt from his cargo trousers in the bedroom and ordered me bare and ass up over his knees, I knew. I had been in trouble before- I had caught many spanking before from both Kelly and Matt but never had I caught the belt on my bare ass before- a paddle, their hand yes, the belt no.

My ass was bright red and felt like it was on fire. Matt had discarded the belt a while back and now was just laying into my ass with his hand. Not that that gave much relief from blinding pain radiating from my butt; Matt and Kelly both had very hard hands and were very skilled at getting their point across with no need for the belt. I could no longer feel when Matt's strikes began and when they stopped - it was just a blur of pain. I had tried fighting against Matt when he failed to stop 20 minutes ago as I began to cry. It was the usual amount metered out by my two lovers- when I was crying I had been punished enough, yet Matt was still continuing. Now I was just limp over his knees knowing I couldn't fight against Matt, not from this position. My last hope that Sev came home soon to witness this and stop Matt from causing major damage to my ass; already I knew that I would have to call in sick tomorrow. There was no way I was going to be able to sit, let alone walk or run . I was sobbing uncontrollably each hit denting my usually unwavering trust in Matt. I would have died for him and Severide at their orders yet this was a new side to Matt I had not experienced before- a cold, unfeeling statue that was unlistening to my distress. My safe word was on the tip of my tongue yet I felt that if I used it Matt would never forgive me for this transgression. I needed his word that I was clean of my mistake that I was forgiven in his and Sev's book. A tiny irrational part of my thought he would call an end to our relationship if I called my safe word now. An even smaller part was wondering if he would stop even if I did call it- with no Kelly here to stop him I wasn't quite so sure. My love for Sev and Matt was overruling the excruciating pain… just.

Just when despair was setting in, I heard the front door click open and the welcoming sound of Kelly coming home. His keys hitting the hall table, the thud of his boots being kicked off and the telltale thud of his feet as he began to walk towards the bedroom where we were. My heart lifted in my chest and sobs of relief came pouring out of my mouth as I waited for Severide to help me. Above me, Matt continued his rhythm of hard swats to my ass.


	2. Chapter 2

_The warnings: this story will contain spanking of an adult, BSDM theme, polyamourous relationship between three people. It will contain non-consensual spanking._

 _I will switch between points of view and between names. I will use Kelly and Severide interchangeably as well as Matt and Casey._

 _Oh, Olivia is a fire fighter under Casey in Truck 81 at the firehouse._

 _No copyright is intended._

 _(Italics are indicating Olivia's dream as she sleeps.)_

 **Olivia's POV**

 _Both of my hands were caught in one of his, his strong grip holding me tightly even though I'm squirming at Matt's ministrations. His other hand was trapping the increasingly loud noises from escaping from my mouth; stopping me from alerting the whole station from what we were doing in the showers. I can feel Kelly's hard cock pressed against my back as I squirm. Kelly has a talent with his mouth between my thighs and has a liking of proving he can turn me into a weeping mess begging for release from his mouth only but Matt is just as talented with his fingers. The steady thrusts of 2 fingers in and out of my pussy, the quick clockwise motion of his thumb on my clit and the occasional pinch of pain as he twists my nipple to try to warn me to keep quiet is keeping me on the edge of release. Kelly whispers dirty fantasies into my ear isn't helping me follow their orders of not cumming without permission. I'm trying focus my gaze on Matt yet every time I manage it Matt hits my G-spot with such accuracy that my vision blurs and instead I train my gaze on the shower wall behind him._

" _Maybe we should leave this desperate… hmm sweetheart, not let ya cum till we get home. Don't think we would do that… what do you think Matt, should we leave her?"_

 _A pained whine escapes Kelly's hand over my mouth at his suggestion. It's another 4 hours of shift left before we could go home and I'd be sure they wouldn't just let me do them hours in peace either. Suddenly my world is moving and I'm being shoved to my knees. A surge of pain flicks through my knees as they hit the floor of the shower but my hands are free and I'm eye level with Matt and Kelly's rock hard cocks. I feel a hand tangle in my hair stopping me from moving forward and a small whine escapes as I try to move to lick the small bead of precome that is on the tip of Kelly's cock. The hand in my hair stops me and the bead drops to the floor and is washed down the drain. I'm aching for the feel of one of their cocks in my mouth, the heavy weight of it on my tongue, the salty taste of pre-cum, the muffled curse as I deep-throat him. I lick my lips and employ my only tactic that I have at my disposal currently. I look up though my lashes and do my best pleading expression at Kelly. He's more of a soft touch than Casey and he breaks quickly,_

" _Fuck! Matt… look at her" He runs a thumb over my lips and I put it in and begin to suck at it, running my tongue run over the calluses on the bottom of his thumb._

" _Damn, you want cock, sweetheart? Yeah, I bet you do. Look at ya, wishing that was mine, such a little cock slut" I feel Matt gives way to Kelly's dirty talk as the hand in my hair slackens. Kelly's thumb retracts from my lips and he lets his hand fall with a sigh to his cock._

" _Go on sweetheart, suck Matt's cock, show him what a good cockslut you are" Kelly keeps talk as I move forward and engulf Matt's cock._

 **Kelly's POV**

Olivia is emitting small whimpers of pleasure in her sleep as she moves slightly under the sheets in the spare room bed. The tear tracks have now been rubbed away, yet her eyes are still red-rimmed from crying. My gut is still wrapped in knots and churning from the scene I walked in on 30 minutes ago. Matt had almost been zombie like, Olivia a sobbing wreck over his knees. I turned away from the bedroom and saw my boots lying haphazardly on the hall floor- I move to tidy them however; my mind isn't really on task as it moves back to Matt. It had been the hysterical sobbing that had alerted me to the disaster ahead of me as I had headed for the main bedroom of the house. It had caused me to break out into a half jog. We didn't start punishment without everyone present- it was one of the rules we had set down. We also usually stopped punishment when Liv started to cry- something wasn't right.

I had pushed the door of the bedroom open to find Liv over Matt's knees, his hand a steady thud on to her butt. Yet, little things unsettled me from this image- Liv and Matt were still in the clothes they had come home from the station in a good hour before. Considering this wasn't out of the ordinary, I kept looking. Then my eyes spotted the belt. It was lying next to Matt's feet on the floor- this may have been normal for some but it was a red flag- Matt was a stickler for being tidy so the belt hadn't been there this morning when we had left for shift this morning. I moved, Matt didn't even stir from his rhythm and I could see the deathlike grip he had on Liv's hips as I skirted around him. It's then that I saw her butt- it was redder than the fire truck of 81 and there was the purple bruising welts from the belt across her butt. Yet Matt seemed unseeing- and clearly unhearing as I tried to talk to him-

"Matt… CASEY!" yet even at the use of his last name he didn't respond, didn't look up. That was when I moved, grabbing Matt's hand and stopping it from falling again- he tried to fight me then, pushing against my hand yet I had the upper hand. I pulled Liv to her feet, her legs buckled and she nearly toppled to the ground. I quickly swing an arm under her collapsing knees and, letting go of Matt's hand, brought the other around her back. I lift her bridal style up into my arms and she buried her head into my neck with a small sob, her arms locking themselves tightly around my neck like she's afraid Matt will tear her away from me. Yet Matt was unmoving still as I moved Liv out of the bedroom and down the hall to the spare room. There I placed her gently on the bed, trying to avoid her butt, yet even as the quilt cover brushes it she yelped in pain. I wrap my arms around her and gently pull her into my arms. She buries her head into my chest and I hold her tightly. It had taken 20 minutes to calm her down from sobbing to hiccups and finally shaking that had eventually given way to sleep 10 minutes ago. It was then that I had retreated to the door of the bedroom.

Now standing in the hallway, I turned my thoughts back to the present and to my other lover. Moving away from the hallway, I move to the kitchen and then towards the main bedroom in search of Matt. The flat's small enough to find him quickly. He doesn't look like he is fairing better with the situation than me or Liv is. He's sitting on the couch in the living room staring unseeingly at his hands. The sounds of footsteps on the floor make him start with a jump. He watches me with wary eyes as I move to sit next to him with a sigh. I run my hands through my hair and over my eyes in despair. I have no idea where to start this conversation- Matt was the one with all the information on the BDSM scene, the one that knew what we were doing. I was following his lead so far, now I have to take the lead on a road I have no idea how to drive on.

 **Olivia's POV**

 _Matt's cock isn't as thick as Kelly's yet it's longer. Uncut and still thicker than the average, he fills my mouth with practised ease; I let my tongue run over the slit causing his hips to jerk and a muffled curse to be emitted from above me. I trace the vein down the underside of his cock and steadily relax my throat to allow his dick to slip into my throat. I contract my throat muscles and feel his cock jerk inside my throat. His hand tightens on my hair and I let him take over as he begins to thrust in and out of my mouth. All I have to do is kneel, keep my teeth out of the way and relax my throat to prevent from gagging. It would be almost soothing to let Matt take control yet Kelly makes his presence known by bringing the ache of my arousal forward to the front of my mind. Kelly is stroking himself, I can hear it in his voice, it's slightly lower, deeper pitched as he continues his talking._

" _Look at you. Kneeling like a good girl at his feet… God, I can see the outline of his cock in your throat… such a good cock slut sweetheart… bet she's tight… warm around you Matt… That's it, he's close… you gonna swallow him sweetheart… look at ya, bet ya need to cum… bet ya aching real bad for it. That pussy is dripping wet, can see that from here… ain't gonna fuck ya though. Gonna leave that for tonight… fuck… let ya wait all day for it…"_

 _I feel Matt's thrusts become more erratic, faster, less controlled as Kelly's words and my throat begin to affect him. He's close now, and as I double my efforts to make him cum, he suddenly buries himself deep in my throat. A rush of salty cum that is so far down my throat that I don't really have a chance to taste it. His hand releases my hair and he moves backwards to slump against the shower wall. His chest is heaving, his eyes still open and watching though. I look up and find Kelly's eyes, he's held off cumming and is stroking himself at such a slow pace it must be painful. He's shuddering slightly and leaning on the wall beside Matt for support. I move to him, bat his hand out of the way, and gently move to bring one of his swollen balls in to my mouth. His hand moves to my hair and he tugs hard-_

" _Don't tease sweetheart!" His voice sounds wrecked, on the edge of desperation._

" _OLIVIA!" Matt's stern tone sends a shiver down my spine and I move my mouth away from Kelly's balls and , taking his cock in my hand, cover the tip of his cock with my mouth. I twirl my tongue around the tip, dipping in to the slit. I then move my mouth further down to deep throat Kelly. I begin to move slowly and I feel let out a guttural sigh. His cock makes my jaw ache at the sheer circumference of it and I feel Kelly suddenly start cumming in sudden spurts down my throat. Just as Kelly's hand distangles itself from my hair, I feel a hand on my back and a warm body cover my back. Matt's hand moves around me and with a flick of his thumb against my clit, he whispers_

" _Cum for us… now!"_

 _The slight sensation and his dominating tone is enough to chuck my idling arousal over and as I feel the ripples of pleasure heighten, I awake._

 **Kelly's POV**

"What the hell happened? I was gone for half an hour. We were fine when we left the station, how did this get so bad, so quickly Matt?" My voice seemed to echo in the quiet flat even though I'm speaking quietly. Unable to stand still, I began to pace. It takes Matt a while to answer, his voice is cracking with emotion and barely audible.

"I just kept remembering Darden. God, watching Andy consumed in flames. Jesus, Kelly that could have been her! If that house had had vents, she wouldn't have lived. I just, kept thinking she could have got killed…"

It's then Matt breaks off with a small sob, I move to him and pull him into a hug. I got it. I shouldn't but we both remember Andy. The instinct to try and protect Liv had been hard for both of us to overcome at the best of times, to remember that Olivia can protect herself. Yet today, going into that townhouse before I had cleared it to be safe had been more than stupid- it had been life-threatening. Matt had overreacted. He had crossed a line and trust had been broken yet I kind of understood. She hadn't deserved the intensity of the spanking by a long shot but I got Casey's mindset. I just didn't know how to we were going to proceed from here.

"God, Kelly, what have I done?" Casey is staring at his hands with a pained look on his face. I go to take Casey's hands to try to let him know I understand but he yanks his hands away.

" Don't. You don't have to pretend to still want to be with me…"

I try to derail this thought immediately going to cut him off-

" STOP! You made a mistake we can work past that Matt…"

"Liv won't want to be with me anymore, I won't break this relationship apart…"

"MATT. Your part of this relationship. We both want you…."

"You don't know that! You both can't trust me anymore. I can't trust me anymore…"

Matt has risen in the argument and is now moving out in to the hallway ,grabbing his hoodie and boots. He won't look at me and is avoiding my desperate touches to try to make him stay.

"Casey… Please, we need you. Don't leave… Don't leave me," I'm desperately imploring him to stay yet he turns and grabs his keys.

"I need some air. To think this through…" is the last words from Casey's mouth as he walks out the front door and the door slams shut.


	3. Chapter 3

_The warnings: this story will contain spanking of an adult, BSDM theme, polyamourous relationship between three people. It will contain non-consensual spanking._

 _No copyright is intended._

 _Sorry for taking such a long time to upload this chapter – I hit such a roadblock with this one. I love any sort of constructive criticism (more so with rave reviews_ _) so feel free to leave either._

 _Enjoy_

 _K xx_

 **Kelly POV**

With the door slamming still ringing in my ears, I sink down on to the sofa. I rub my hands through my hair as silence falls over the apartment. I feel tired, my limbs heavy and I lean back and settle my gaze on the clock watching and waiting.

Minutes merge in to hours as I sit there, darkness creeps into the apartment and my mind wanders. Away from my girl in the next room, away from my partner and best friend wandering the streets of Chicago somewhere and back to the beginning…

 _It started with a sigh – well more of a huff as I crash my body downwards on to Casey's bunk in the Lieutenant's Quarters, wrinkling the sheets and causing the springs to complain loudly. Casey ignores me in favour of the Action Report that he is filling out in front of him. I lay there for a minute, trying to collect my thoughts and find the best way to approach this. Then again, there is no really good way of approaching this so,_

" _You ever dominated a girl? Like properly?"_

 _My voice seems loud in the office and Casey turns with a raised eyebrow,_

" _Why? Troubles in paradise with Olivia?"_

" _Maybe, I don't know" I sit up turning my gaze down to the blanket as I recount the night before happenings with Olivia. After the initial spark, that had caused me to actually progress from my one-night-stand-only-status to a second date kinda guy, I had expected the sex to be amazing. Yet last night, being our first time together, was a flop. I'm not trying to beat my chest but after being a bit of a lothario through my life I had been used to being very good at sex. Then she dropped a bombshell on me that I wasn't sure that I could understand on my own._

" _Olivia is in to BDSM. Like properly, not just needing me to be forceful. It's not that the idea doesn't turn me on, Jesus it does, just looking some stuff up online caused me to get hard you know, but being horny for it and knowing what I am doing is two very different things."_

 _I hear Matt hum in agreement and as I turn my gaze up from the blanket I find his focused out of the window, carefully considering his options before saying,_

" _I've been on the scene before. I could give you a few tips and help you to get this right."_

 _I breathe a sign of relief and flop backwards on to his bunk again._

" _Thanks man, I appreciate it."_

 _Just as I open my mouth to ask Casey where the hell I would begin with something like this, the bell sounds through the house._

" _Engine 51, Truck 81, Ambulance 61; House fire Peterson Avenue."_

 _The call is a blur but as we gear up to go inside the house, a thought struck me. It was nearly impossible to teach someone something to do – just as we couldn't let an Candidate loose inside a fire straight out of the Academy, just telling me what to do with Olivia wasn't really going to cut it. Telling someone and showing someone were two separate things and either was okay but in this situation, with Olivia's heart and wellbeing on the line, I wasn't about to risk it. The idea began to formulate in my mind and as we pulled back into the Firehouse an hour later, the idea was set._

 _I follow Matt back to his office and quickly close the door behind me. He has his back to me we I say,_

" _What if you show me… show me how to do this?"_

 _Matt turns quickly around to me, mouth already open to object however I continue talking first trying to get him on board with my plan before he outright objects,_

" _It's not like we haven't shared girls before? Remember Lucy? We've seen each other naked more times that practically anybody else. I know Olivia finds you attractive, if you're not comfortable with having sex with her then just be there to guide me through this whole domination thing. Please."_

 _Matt sinks down on to his chair and breathes out of sigh._

" _Let me think about it."_

 _I move towards the door,_

" _I haven't said yes Severide." Matt calls to me and I turn smirk and shoot back,_

" _You haven't said no though!"_

 _It took Casey more than 2 days to come up with his decision. He turned to me later that week over a half finished Chinese and all he said was "okay."_

 **Olivia POV**

I awoke to silence. The bed was empty – not uncommon for our relationship. Matt and Kelly were always up before me – out running or out doing some construction work. I swing my legs out of bed and begin to get up before realising that it is still dark outside. Strange – it being the middle of spring edging into summer it should be bright sunshine. I turn my gaze to the clock and see the illuminated time – 23:26. Odd, I move out of the bedroom and take note of the hall. Matt's jacket is gone, as are his shoes from the hall and his keys from the rack. Panic grips me. He had left, had Kelly kicked him out? What had happened after Kelly had extradited me from Casey less than 3 hours ago?

I move into the lounge and the panic doesn't ease as I see Kelly. He is sitting in the dark, shadows being cast long across the floor from the streetlights outside. His gaze is fixed on the wall in front of him, not moving even as I draw closer to him. Lost in thought he doesn't even blink as I move around the sofa and settle my head on his shoulder.

He starts then, jumping with the contact and moves to settle me further into his lap. The silence is deafening, questions press to the front of my mind however, I push them down, now is not the time.

We stay like that, curled around each other for half an hour or so before I feel Severide stir. I feel his arms move from around my waist to move me, I whimper softly. However, that whimper soon dies as I am moved to straddle Kelly's thighs to face him.

His hands move from my waist to cup my ass. I hiss slightly at the contact and his hands move slightly press lightly over. His touch is more clinical than sexual – he's checking the damage. He hums slightly and his hands still, clearly he has found nothing that is too bad. The pain has dimmed to a dull ache and is bearable now after my sleep.

"What the hell happened back there?"

Kelly's voice is loud in the apartment after it being silent for so long. I move my gaze to his blue eyes, searching them to see if he is mad.

"I don't know. You talked to Matt, what did he say? Why isn't he here? What happened after I fell asleep? Does he not want to be in a relationship with me, with us?"

My voice is getting louder and faster as the questions begin to pour out of me and my breathing starts to edge towards hyperventilating. My vision begins to blur slightly and just as I am about to cry, I feel an arm around me. Kelly pulls me closer to him and I bury my head in his shoulder. He rocks me for a little bit to try and calm me down. My breathing begins to slow and he moves me away from his shoulder so that he can look in my eyes.

"I want this relationship, Matt does too, okay… he went for a walk. He thinks you hate him, that he went too far this time and I want to know why you didn't safe word?"

Kelly raises his eyebrow and looks at me, waiting for an answer.

"I don't hate him! We can work this out right? I mean, he's gonna come around?"

I pause and Kelly nods.

My initial concerns settled for now, I turn my eyes down to the floor rather than meet his eyes as I pick at one of the cushions beside us. I concentrate on separating the strands of thread from each other on the tassel hanging from the corner of the cushion as I try to avoid the conversation that I know is coming.

Why hadn't I used my safe word? I wasn't sure I even had an answer for that. I trusted both Kelly and Matt completely – I mean I trusted them with my life in a fire everyday at work; you don't get more trusting than that. Trusting them with my emotions and wellbeing was a little harder for me but nearly a year into the relationship I felt like I was getting used to letting them in. I feel Kelly shift beside me; his patience was longer than Matt's for sure however, it was wearing thin and fast as I avoided looking at him and let the silence drag on. I hear him blow out a breath as he debates between losing his temper with me and yelling at me and trying to be understanding and letting me work it out on my own.

I feel him move, a warm hand settles over mine, stilling them from their movement. His other finds my chin and moves my head upwards. I try to maintain eye contact with the ground for as long as possible however, it soon becomes impossible to keep and I am forced to move my gaze upwards to meet his eye. Again, he raises an eyebrow, questioning my silence, asking for an answer.

"I don't know"

"That's a cope-out!"

Was the quick retort from Kelly, as he dismisses me initial attempt to try to end this conversation before it had began. "You should have safe worded the minute it became too much. I need to know Olivia – what was happening in your head?"

I extradited one of my hands from his grip and begin to trace patterns on the back of his, trailing my nails lightly around and around before letting lose my biggest fear,

"I deserved it. Matt wouldn't have forgiven me if I hadn't taken my punishment. If I had safe worded I would have disappointed him…" A small sob works its way up my throat as tears pool in my eyes.

I feel Kelly shift and I feel the tears fall as I wait for him to move away. I leave me here. Yet suddenly warm arms are cradling me, a hard chest becomes my ceiling as he pulls me to him bracketing me in to him as he rocks me gently through the sobs that shake my whole body.

"I couldn't lose you both… I don't want to disappoint you… Kelly… Please don't leave me, I'll be better… I'll be good…" spew out of my mouth with my harse sobs.

Kelly shushes me and continues to hold me tightly as I shake in his arms, the tears soaking his t-shirt, as I feel like my heart could break and come out of my chest. Matt had left and I was scared, scared that he wouldn't forgive me, scared that he wouldn't come home, scared that Kelly would leave too.

I feel Kelly move me to back to straddle his lap as he brushes the stray hairs out of my face and to wipe away my tears with a tissue. Before cupping my face with both of his hands, looking me in the eyes and as his bright blue meet my green I saw the love that was in them, the kindness and the compassion that burned bright as he rubbed a thumb across my cheekbone,

"We won't leave you. You did disappoint us -you scared the hell out of us and we are angry with you for that stupid stunt you pulled today but that doesn't mean that we will leave you. I guarantee that both Matt and me will make you angry, will disappoint you too but that isn't the end of the relationship lovey. No one's perfect. You should have safe worded. It would have changed nothing between our relationship. You should feel safe enough to safe word when we do something that isn't right or okay with you. You are good; you are more than enough for us. You don't need to change or god forbid take an unfair and over-the-top punishment to prove that."

He moved forward to kiss me gently, our lips slotting together easily as he licks my lips open. I tilt my head back slightly, as his hand moves from my jaw backwards to tangle in my hair at the nape of my neck. I cling to him as our tongues intermingle. He breaks the kiss first as he leans back looking at his watch

"Come on love – it's almost 2 in the morning. At least we don't have to work tomorrow"

I go to move off of his lap but he growls slightly in the back of this throat and I halt. He slides a hand under the back of my thighs and lifts me up in his arms as he stands.

"Show-off" I giggle but bury my head in his chest nonetheless as he moves us through to the bedroom before depositing me on to the bed. I crawl back under the covers, stripping off my hoodie that I had pulled on as Kelly moves around the bed pulling off his t-shirt and jeans before slipping under the covers behind me.

I feel an arm wind around my waist and I turn slightly, pressing my head onto his chest and listening to the steady thump of his heartbeat and as sleep takes over again I feel a light kiss on my forehead.

 **Matt's POV**

I've been walking for hours around and around Chicago. Street after street, turning left and right blindly, unsure of where I am going, completely lost in thought that I'm not sure entirely where I am. The picture of Olivia's tearstained face is as fresh in my mind as it was when I left the apartment, as well as Kelly's as I walked out of the door. Yet I can't seem to find the courage to go back, to open that front door again and see what damage I had left behind, what charred remains lay behind.

I turn reach a road and turn again, left this time as a memory comes to mind unbidden but it seers away the pictures of tonight's horror and I feel myself sink downwards on to a bench as the memory takes over.

 _It should have taken me more time to say no to Severide and his request – ultimately I should have said no completely. However, it was true we had shared girls before – one-night stands that had come back to the apartment; we worked together in perfect tandem daily that this was just another extension of that. Sharing looks rather than words, knowing the others body well enough to know when to switch around and when to move closer._

 _I had found every reason possible to say no – there were so many reasons not to do this that they almost tripled in number to the reasons to do so. Yet… I was weak in the end, every reason in the world couldn't stop me from looking up from my half-finished dim sum at 8:30 on that Friday to cave and saying "okay"._

 _We hadn't wasted time after that – Kelly had quizzed me on different aspects of the lifestyle and we had sat and talked for 3 beers each and 4 hours. I tried to answer as many of Kelly's questions as possible. I had been doing scenes with girls since I had started the Academy and so could answer most of his concerns and questions easily. However, in the end, Kelly had been right – it was harder to tell him how to be dominant, it had been easier to guide him in that respect._

A loud bang startled me out of my memory and I look around, really seeing for the first time. I'm very far from the apartment I realise as I focus my eyes in the dark on the small park in the middle of a housing estate well over a mile away. Other things then began to filter in to my conscious now I was out of my blind state. The cold for one began to seep in through my padded firehouse jacket, my fingers were going numb and I stuff them into my pockets in an attempt to keep them attached as I rack my brains for the quickest way from here back to the apartment. I eventually decide no way is the quickest and start homewards letting my mind wander again back in an effort to stop myself from dying of hypothermia as I quicken my pace to a brisk walk hoping the movement may generate more body heat.

" _Harder" I say again to Kelly as I move to push his hand tighter around Olivia's wrist. He is straddling her, holding her hands above her head as she lays under him on the bed. He turns to look at me. He's having a hard trouble adjusting to this dominant persona. He sighs and pushing down again but again as he turns his attention to Olivia's neck to suck a hickey his grip loosens. I move forwards again to correct him however Olivia has had enough. She quickly flips them, reversing positions to sit upright on his hips._

" _This isn't working." She turns from looking at Kelly to look at me "It's nice that you're trying to guide him however maybe a more visual demonstration would work better. Give him something to copy." She cocks her head to the side and waits._

 _I dart my eyes to Kelly – she is his girl after all; he nods._

" _Okay"_

 _I move to pull my t-shirt up and over my head, leaving my jeans on my hips as I turn to face Olivia who is still straddling Severide on the bed. I feel her eyes move down my abs almost as if she is touching me as I move towards the bed. Kelly slides his legs out from under her and moves to recline against the headboard._

 _I press a hand against her stomach lightly, running it upwards to the curve of her breast and then downwards to her pelvis bone._

" _You gonna be a good girl for me? Hmm…" She moans, tipping her head backwards, rocking backwards on her heels. I wait a beat, then bring my hand down hard across her inner thigh. The crack is loud in the almost silent room, but it doesn't hid the gasp from Kelly._

" _I asked you a question love. I'd like an answer"_

" _Yes sir" is gasped from her as she moans again. My handprint is startling red on her milky white thigh as I move to brush my hand over the mark, kneading my fingers in slightly._

" _Lie down on your back, hands above your head" My voice drops lower in a scene and as I move backwards and to the side to give her room to follow my orders I make eye contact with Kelly. I raise an eyebrow slightly in a silent question – is he okay? Have I hit a limit yet? But he shakes his head slightly, smiling a weak smile; he's okay for now. I hear a moan beside us and I turn my attention back to the beautiful girl laying spread on the bed beside us. She has followed instructions and is laying on her back, her head tilted to the side to watch the exchange between me and Kelly. I move back to her and straddle her waist, moving to press my left hand over her crossed wrists, pressing at least half of my weight downwards, making sure that Kelly has a good view. I feel her press upwards slightly, testing the grip but as she realises she can't escape she moans again and settled back down. I bend down, leaning more of my weight on to her wrists as I bit down hard on to the curve of her breast. She tries to arch upwards as I pull my teeth in and suck hard. I move again marking another hickey on to the other breast, this time slightly more centred just below her nipple. She is continually moaning above me now, as I begin to alternate kisses and sharp nips all over her breasts, avoiding her nipples. I grow bored quickly and move to take one of her nipples in to my mouth sucking hard. I move backwards to blow cold air on to the wet nipple and watch as it hardens. I repeat the same treatment on the other nipple._

 _I press my hand down hard on her wrists,_

" _Keep them there"_

 _I say as I move my hands down to her hips as I shift to kneel between her spread legs. I lightly touch her ankle and start to drift my fingers up her calf and then move to trail kisses following my fingers. When I get to her knee on one leg, I move to the ankle of the other and repeat the same. As I get to the knee of this one, I feel her squirm and then a hand tangles in my hair. I slap her inner thigh hard and move my head backwards to glare at her,_

" _Hands!"_

 _She quickly moves her hands above her head again, gripping the sheets above her to stop her moving again._

 _After a beat, I move down again and start to trail kisses up her inner thighs. I get half way up the first thigh when she starts to squirm her hips too much. I move one of my hands to pin her hips downwards stopping her movement. When I reach the junction of her hip, I move again to the other leg._

" _Please…. Oh god… Please…" Her head is thrown back now, eyes squeezed closed and her chest is heaving as she sucks in breath._

 _I skim my fingertips over the top of her panties, gently dragging my fingers under the waistband to tease her lower abdomen. I feel her hips cant against my other hand as she continues to beg. I cup my hand over her pussy, feeling the wet spot that has begun._

" _You're wet. You enjoying this? Hmmm…"_

" _Yes… oh god yes…. I need to cum please Sir…"_

 _I hear a low groan from the right of me and I turn my attention to the side – Kelly is leaning backwards slightly on to the headboard. He is palming himself through his jeans. I can see the outline of his cock in the jeans and he is rock hard. I move, pushing Olivia's panties down her legs, letting her kick them off and on to the floor of the bedroom. I sink one finger into her quickly, she clenches down hard in surprise. I hum in response before moving to lick a stripe up her pussy. She cries out loudly, arching up. I move both hands to pin her hips downwards so she can't move or squirm away as I move to lick along her pussy lips before sucking her clit hard._

" _Please can I cum? Please Sir?"_

 _She is begging above me, I move my head away for a second,_

" _No. Don't you dare! You cum before I say I swear I will keep you cumming until you can't anymore!"_

 _She whimpers slightly before I move downwards again. I harden my tongue and start to fuck into her quickly. I feel the bed dip and hear her moan cut off. I dart my gaze up to see Kelly brushing away stray tears that were making their way down her cheeks before pushing two fingers in to her mouth. She hollows her cheeks sucking hard, focusing her gaze on to Kelly's face as I double my efforts to tease her to oblivion._

 _After a few minutes more of teasing, I move my face back,_

" _Cum for us babe."_

 _With those words I thrust two fingers deep in her and curl them upwards hard against her. Her hips arch wildly and she cums with a scream, thrashing as I continue to crook my fingers and move to suck her clit again until she is whimpering softly moving under me trying to get her sensitive clit away from me._

The apartment comes into sight and with a breath; I push my key into the door. I enter and toe off my shoes and hang my coat again, revealing in the warmth of the apartment. I pause, the apartment's quiet, there is no movement. I peek into the living room but the lights are off and it's vacant so I move towards the bedroom. I lean against the doorway and take in the picture.

Olivia is curled in Kelly's arms, head on his chest, her hair messy over his arm where it is curling around her back. Kelly's chest was rising slowly but as I move my eyes to his face I see his eyes snap open. We make eye contact but he doesn't move. He's waiting; waiting for me to move into the room or to walk away again. I'm so absorbed watching Kelly that I don't see Olivia move at first. She is half way across the room before I notice her. She's only in a t-shirt and panties, showing off her long legs and her hair is falling in messy waves around her face. I open my mouth to speak, I'm not sure what I would say but before the words can come out she places a finger on my lips. I feel her hand in mine as she pulls me towards the bed. Her hands move to pull my shirt over my head and she unzips my jeans before pushing them down my hips. As I move to pull them off, she pushes my shoulders hard causing me to fall backwards on to the bed. I feel Kelly's arm clasp itself on mine to stop me moving as Olivia climbs back into the bed to shuffle herself in between us. I feel her turn to press her front against mine, and Kelly moving to lay behind her, weaving an arm around her to clasp my hand. I settle my body downwards and turn slightly so Olivia is tucked slightly on to my chest and make eye contact with Kelly one more time. He smiles before moving to close his eyes. I run my hand through Olivia's hair as I drift off into sleep wrapped around my two favourite people in the world. Tomorrow we're going to have to talk about tonight but for now I let sleep take me.


	4. xx Note to Readers xx

NOTE

Hi to all – This isn't a chapter but it is a note for everyone that is reading this – whether you are following this story or you're a first timer to the story.

I have had quite a few comments/reviews that say stuff along the lines that this doesn't represent a good/true BDSM relationship and that my characters are being controlling/manipulative; that hurting or bruising the other is not sexy.

I felt that this needed to be addressed.

Firstly, they are correct that is **NOT** meant to represent a healthy or good BDSM relationship in the first chapter and the resounding fall out in the next chapters. Saying that the flashback in Chapter 2 was meant to show a better and healthier relationship. Maybe I didn't make that clear in my writing or my description however it wasn't meant to show or glorify hitting or hurting someone in the name of love. I tried to make it clear in the description of this story that the outset of this story was a **major** mistake on Casey's part that lead to something that crossed the line of abuse. It would follow the way the relationship would have to evolve and change to repair the breach of trust – whether the characters could move past that and make things work again. I wanted to try and show the careful line that is in the BDSM community of the relationship and how that can turn into abuse if the trust is broken and limits are ignored/not talked about etc. Maybe my writing doesn't reflect that however that was where my head was at when writing this.

Secondly, my characters are not meant to be manipulative. If they come off as such that is my mistake and so I apologise for that, if that is how you see them as being written, I will say this throughout – please point out to me where they appear manipulative and I will do my best to change that.

Thirdly, I would like to point out that as a virgin and a complete novice in the BDSM world, my story may be incorrect or written wrongly in representing this world. My knowledge comes from other stories I have read and other media. I am trying the best I can to relay a world that I know very little about but find very arousing so, if you participate in BDSM and I relay something that you find as being wrong or discrimative in any way – please let me. I am inexperienced in this so please give me a heads up if I need to change anything at all – I love **constructive** criticism.

I would also like to add – without sounding defensive or angry, that if you think that BDSM is abuse, if you do not like spanking or any thing that is in this story please feel free to press the back button and leave. I am not holding you hostage to the computer; you are free to leave at any point. I clearly state at the start that this will contain the same and so if you continue to read – don't leave negative reviews with me that BDSM is abuse. I am trying to show that it is not abuse in anyway. It is a relationship that contains a lot of trust and love. Don't hate on others – I make it quite clear what this is about from the start.

I would like to say to everyone who has left me lovely comments/reviews – thank you for that. I am slightly stuck on where this story is going from here so if you have any ideas please message me with them – I could really do with some ideas from here. I know that the three need to talk this out.

Any BDSM veterans out there – please give me some ideas as to how this relationship should go from here, how they would interact etc.

Thank you for continuing to read this story and helping me make my writing better. If you have left me great reviews – I am forever grateful!

All my love,

K

xx


	5. Chapter 4

_The warnings: this story will contain spanking of an adult, BSDM theme, polyamourous relationship between three people._

 _No copyright is intended._

 _Let's get started in repairing this relationship shall we!?_

 _Enjoy_

 _K xx_

 **Kelly's POV**

The screen flickers in front of me. Again, I move the cursor on to another link from the search engine's results and as the page loads, I move to gulp another swig from my coffee cup. As the almost scalding liquid slid down my throat, I turn my attention to the words hovering on the page on my laptop. I've been sitting here for over two hours moving from one page to another, reading and re-reading all the material that I can find.

The heading "Safe, Sane & Consensual" comes in view and I pick the pen beside my coffee cup again as I prepare to make notes from this page.

 **Matt's POV**

The thrum of the truck's engine is almost calming as I weave my way through the early morning traffic. I've been on the road for almost an hour now yet I've barely moved more than 20 miles – I curse myself for not leaving earlier. Olivia had said that I would hit traffic; I had really thought that it would be early enough that I would get through and on to the Highway before commuters started to move towards their work, obviously I had been wrong. Then again, the extra time in the truck was giving me time to get my thoughts in order. I need the time to get my story right – make sure I was mentally prepared for what was to come.

It is almost an hour later that I pull into the club's parking lot and pull into a space. The lot is empty – as it should be this time of the morning. A flock of crows fly off cawing loudly as I slam my truck door shut and head for the front door of Galleria Domain 2.

 **Kelly's POV**

Five pages of writing later I sit back as I rub my hand over my face. My head feels so full that I think my brain may start to leak out of my ears any minute. I move from my chair, as I stretch upwards the bones in my back crack loudly. Rolling my shoulders, I move towards the coffee pot again for a refill when I feel hands slid around my sides to my biceps and a small body press itself into my back.

"Morning babe."

I feel her hum in response and feel a kiss to the back of my neck before a cold breeze hits me as she moves away to pad towards the living room and collapses on to the sofa, circling slightly on to her side. Olivia pulls one of the throws off the back of the couch to cover herself with before closing her eyes again. I debate pouring her a coffee as I pour yet another in to my cup but eventually decide against it. It would only go cold I think as I hear her breathing even out as she drifts off to sleep again. I move to sit back down opposite my laptop and pull my notes towards me. I sip my coffee as I begin to read through my notes.

 **Matt's POV**

The inside of the club is dark compared to the bright morning blooming outside and I have to hover in the doorway a second to let my eyes adjust to the gloom. As the bar comes in to focus I spot Drew near the back of the bar, lounging in an armchair. His broad arm stretched across the back of the chair, one leg hooked over the other at the knee as he quips a joke with the bartender before moving to sip his drink and flicking his gaze to the phone on the table beside him.

I pause, nerves suddenly getting the better of me. It had been years since I had seen my old mentor. Drew had introduced me into the scene, shown me the rules and procedures of being a good Dom, even helping me understand my needs and kinks that I had been embarrassed about having. Even after I had turned my back on the lifestyle, Drew had still offered to extend a hand if I ever needed it. Right now, I knew I deserved a severe tongue lashing from him and defiantly some advice. As I tried to shake the anxiety that had balled itself in my stomach, I moved my gaze upwards and found Drew had turned his attention from his phone and was watching me closely. I forced my feet to move the 50 feet or so across the bar, sending a quick nod towards the bartender as I passed. At the table, I moved to sit in the chair opposite Drew, declining a drink with a small shake of my head.

"It's been a long time Matthew."

I shudder slightly – Drew and my dad were the only people ever in my life to call me Matthew. I had tried to get Drew out of the habit yet he always seemed set in calling me by my given name. It usually didn't bother me too much up until now but with my current mental state, my full name brought a cold shiver down my spine and an uneasy, slightly sick feeling to my stomach. I open my mouth to respond but unsure of what to say I close it again. I'd had almost 2 ½ hours in which to think of what I was going to say but now I was here every word and sentence I had carefully constructed had evaporated.

"What's eating ya Matt? Something's got ya tongue for sure." Drew's Texas drawl slightly loosened the nerves in my stomach as he tilts his head to the side for a second watching me as I grasp around for the right words, "No one here to judge ya Matt, only me and you – what's happened?"

With that, I look up into his eyes, those kind soft eyes that always seemed unfazed no matter what came out of my mouth. I was sure that I could tell Drew that I had killed someone and he would still be unfazed and have some advice for me. With a small sigh, I begin to speak. Over the next 30 minutes everything poured out – not just the disaster of last night of which I was so ashamed, but also the fears of my relationship with Kelly and Olivia and the strain of trying to balance our relationship and our jobs.

Throughout the entire thing, Drew stays quiet, nodding slightly when I glance at him, humming when I pause until I run out of words and collapse my head forwards into my hands. The weight that had been pressing down on my shoulders feels slightly lighter somehow. I had feared that voicing my concerns to Kelly would make him think less of me somehow. I was the one that was the more experienced of the three of us – I should have been able to balance our home- BDSM - work situation and I wasn't. Our relationship was crumbling and I wasn't sure how to patch the walls up this time.

Drew lets out a low whistle as he utters his verdict of the situation,

"Geez, you don't go for the easy options do ya?!"

I stare at him blankly; he laughs slightly and shakes his head,

"Ya couldn't just find a nice gal and settle down? Ya had to pick to go into a BDSM relationship, not only that but a BDSM polyamourous relationship, not only that but with two Doms and then you have to make an already complicated thing even harder by doing **all of that** with two people that you work with. Matt, you really know how to pick a complicated situation!"

He takes a swig of the water before placing the glass back on the table between us and settles back eyeing me for a second before he began to speak,

"Okay boy you want some advice, stop blaming yourself - you trying to hold a whole house up with one wall. It's not possible – I know ya think that you need to be the leader here and no-one's disagreeing with that but ya need to let the other two in. Let them know what your thinking, your fears. They need to be able to help ya hold that house up too."

He shifts before leaning forward, keeping eye contact as I try to break it,

"My second thing – everyone makes mistakes Matt. You made a mistake last night. No one, from what I hear, is denying that, you seem to be the only one that is holding it against you though. Mistakes can be moved past. You're not perfect Matt, and you never will be. A big part of relationships is the others loving you for the imperfect person that you are. You're acknowledging the mistake – you're not trying to hide it from anyone. That's a good sign. The biggest warning sign for abuse in this kind of relationship is trying to hide the mistakes. You've made a mistake, okay now fix it."

Drew pauses again to take another sip of water before settling back in his chair, his gaze firmly chained on mine.

I dither for a second before moving slightly forward as the first of many questions leaves my lips. If anyone can help me get this relationship back on track and healthy again – Drew's my guy.

 **Kelly's POV**

It's mid-day before I stop researching and put away my laptop. With almost 8 pages of notes, tips and game plans I feel slightly more knowledgeable and in control of the situation. Coming into the lounge last night, ready to face off with Matt had made me realise I wasn't prepared. I knew nothing of this type of relationship – whether it be the BDSM or the polyamory side of things, or even the balance of the two. I had been content to take a step back and let Matt take the lead; happy to observe and participate when led by Matt. But last night had made me realise I had taken a backseat in the relationship – just sort of standing here watching as Matt drove - not feeling capable or prepared enough to make judgement on the route we were going.

It had been quite un-nerving at first glance. All of the information I had found had either had the opinion that having two Doms in a polyamorous relationship was something that was not capable of working or it was something where the two relationships had to be kept separate – one Dom for set days and the other on the next days. Nothing seemed to support the idea of three people being in the same relationship at the same time. Yet the more that I read, the more I researched, I found more stories and blogs that gave more ideas than outright criticism about the relationship. Throughout all of the blogs, stories, online posts and forums I had gone through today one thing had been the most prominent – communication.

Whether it be checking in with Olivia throughout the scene, talking after the scene, or talking through our relationship it all required us to be on the same page. The more I had read, the more I realised that some of the early measures that we had used at the start of the relationship had be forgotten or pushed to one side as we had progressed. I couldn't even remember the last time I had asked Olivia her safe word before last night – let alone checked in during a scene. Most of the websites had stated that as you got comfortable in a relationship and as you learnt each other's boundaries, if unchecked, the early measures such as safewords and talking about a scene, could be missed or fade out unintentionally.

Now, with almost half a day of research and a whole lot of notes I felt prepared to discuss all of this with Matt – it was time that I stood up and started to take over driving –for half of the way at least.

 **Matt's POV**

I pulled into the drive around 3'o clock with my ears still ringing from Drew's advice and a determination to try to make this relationship okay again. As I move up the stairs and into the apartment, I peer through the bedroom door – the bed has been vacated yet the covers remain thrown haphazardly across it. I shake my head with a small smile – how is it that Olivia is able to be so neat at the firehouse and so messy at home. I straighten the bedclothes, chucking abandoned clothes at the washing basket and drawing back the curtains.

I hear Severide before I see him – I'm moving to pull the second curtain back as the familiar thud of his bare feet on the hardwood floor in the hall become noticeable. I turn as he enters the room, chucking his laptop on to the bed – wrinkling the freshly made blankets. However, I am distracted from the same as he moves towards me to slide a calloused hand around my neck, gripping the stray hairs at my nape, before leaning in to press a soft kiss on my lips. I respond immediately – I feels like forever that we have been close to intimate with each other. In reality, it would have only be about a day or so but since the evolution of our relationship from friends to partners we had never gone more than several hours without being touchy-feely in some capacity – whether it be light touches or kisses or hugs.

I move to trace Kelly's lips with my tongue, trying to coax his out to play however, he keeps the kiss chaste for once. He moves his head back in favour of pressing our foreheads together and drawing a shuddering breath,

"It's been a crazy 24 hours huh."

I nod slightly,

"We need to talk… all of us."

I move to meet Kelly's eyes; his bright blues meet my grey/green ones as I nod again.

"I agree - I talked to Drew today. He's my old mentor. He gave me some advice."

I feel Kelly move his hand from the nape of my neck to grab my hand, his thumb rubbing slightly across the knuckles as he half drags me into the living room. I spot Olivia then. She's curled up on the sofa, a blanket half over her head.

"She's been there since about 10 this morning. Not moved since."

Was the whisper in my ear as Kelly lets go of my hand in favour of moving towards the table behind us. I turn and spot the bombsite that was our kitchen table when I had left that morning. Strewn with paper, all covered in Kelly's scrawl, I was unable to see the surface. I see Kelly smile slightly at my slight OCD tendencies as he rolls his eyes and begins to move the paper in to some kind of pile. Stopping halfway to move a coffee cup to the sideboard and re-couple a pen and lid again.

I pull one of the pieces of paper towards me, and run my gaze quickly over the page. Kelly been doing his homework – most of the stuff on the page is things that Drew has been re-iterating with me this morning – communication, being safe, safe word use etc.

"Family meeting?" I look at Kelly, who darts a look at the sleeping bundle on the couch before nodding.

"Yeah – now?"

"Now seems like as good as time as any."

 **Olivia POV**

A murmur of voices penetrates the thick blanket that I had wrapped around my body and head. I turn my head further into the cushion as I hear the voices get closer to me; hoping that they would get the hint and go away. After being up until 3 o'clock this morning and having Matt and Kelly get up at an ungodly hour of 7 o'clock I was shattered and with a 24-hour shift tomorrow, I wanted to lay comatosed on the couch until I had to move for shift and not a second before.

Unfortunately, there seemed to be other plans as the blanket was peeled away from my face. I squint as the bright light blinds me for a second, before Matt and Kelly focus into my vision. Matt was back? What time was it? The confusion must have shown on my face as Kelly moved to look at his watch,

"It's past 3 in the afternoon love. You planning on moving at sometime today?"

I shake my head before trying to grab the blanket off Casey in order to snuggle back down again. But Casey shakes his head and moves the edge of the blanket out of my reach,

"Nope. Come on love – up and at 'em. Me and Kelly want to have a family meeting and that means you have to at least be awake for it."

I groan but move to roll off of the sofa. Both Matt and Kelly move to the kitchen table as I stretch slightly before padding over to the table, dragging the throw with me. I wrap the blanket around myself again, forming a kind of cocoon before curling up in one of the chairs.

"Okay – who's starting?"

Kelly is the one that breaks the silence first. Him and Casey exchange looks for a few seconds before Casey shrugging,

"I'll go."

He moves to pull his chair closer to the table, resting both forearms on the same before pulling in a breath and starting to talk.

 **Third Party POV**

Over the next 4 hours, Chinese is ordered and over the dim sum and prawn crackers Drew's advice is talked over, Kelly's research is explained and Casey finally voices his feelings probably for the first time in the relationship. They reassure and encourage each other as the cups of coffee cool in front of them and through the jumbled mess of fears, hopes and advice a game plan is found.

A common ground whereby the two Doms propose to communicate so well that they will probably develop ESP; safe words are re-established and rules are re-instated – for the two Doms as well as Olivia. They vow that the safeguards that were present at the start of the relationship will be put back in and fears of the relationship ending are addressed so clearly that, if it where glass, you would be able to see straight through it.

They try to promise that the work and home boundaries will be upheld for the most part and that no scenes will not be practised in the firehouse – Olivia is left pouting at that one yet neither Dom will budge, not even a little inch.

As the night, draws to a close as Olivia's eye begin to droop – even though Kelly laughs that she has been asleep for a good portion of the day – Matt lifts her easily into his arms and they migrate into the bedroom to curl hand in hand in the bed again with lighter hearts and a game plan in place.

 _I hope you have enjoyed this chapter. Smut will follow in the next chapter because I just cannot resist._

 _Just a note before you go:_

 _Galleria Domain 2 – this is a BDSM Club in Chicago if you were wondering about the odd name of the club that Casey went to. No copyright intended on this behalf._

 _Again, I love feedback so please feel free to leave a comment below._

 _All the love_

 _Katie_


	6. Chapter 5

**The warnings: this story will contain spanking of an adult, BSDM theme, polyamourous relationship between three people.**

 _With the relationship now back on track - time for some smut!_

 _I apologise for such a long delay for this chapter to be posted – I didn't realise it had been so long. I was having trouble trying to get the dynamic to work right between the characters._

 _Special shoutout to Starwarslover4life for getting me moving to post this chapter – thank you for such a nice review and I hope that this is everything that you have been waiting for!_

 _As ever please review or PM me – I love to know that people like what they read!_

 _All the love_

 _K xx_

Olivia POV

I feel Matt's hand squeeze my hip lightly as he leans in to kiss the back of my neck, his lips lingering on the nape of my neck for a second. I move my head to the side to kiss Matt on the lips however before I can get close, he is moving again. He grabs his phone off of the bedside table and is moving back out of the bedroom into the hall in a blink. I sigh slightly as I turn my head back and I listen to Matt swearing slightly under his breath as he can't locate his keys and then again when his jacket gets caught on the hook.

"Severide, I'll see you at the Station in 30 okay?"

Matt hurriedly yells as he pulls the front door open and, not waiting for a response, rushes out. I start with the door banging, blinking a couple of time making my eyes come back in to focus and I realise that I have been lightly stroking my neck for the past few minutes where Matt had kissed. A memory surfaces unbidden from a few months ago–

 _Matt is standing behind me as I sit at the dressing table brushing my hair. As he comes up behind me I put the brush down. He leans over sliding his hands down my arms to pin my wrists on to the chairs arms. He leans in and the smell of his deodorant wafts over me as I feel his lips brush the shell of my ear. His breath tickles my ear as he whispers quietly – "You gonna be a good girl for us today? Huh, you gonna keep this pussy untouched all day for me and Kelly like a good girl? You gonna keep that little vibrator inside you all day? 'Cause if you do we'll reward you tonight" A moan vibrates in my throat,_

" _Yes Sirrrrr…." Just as I speak, Matt moves one hand off of my wrists and moves a hand to his pocket and the tiny vibrator in my pussy begins to vibrate causing the end of my sentence to turn in to a low moan instead._

I shake my head violently, dislodging the memory and refocusing on the mirror. As I shift in the chair to reach for a makeup brush I realise that I am dripping wet. I shake myself slightly, ignoring the pulsing need from my pussy and drop the makeup brush back on the dresser deciding against it, instead reaching for my hairbrush.

With new underwear on and my hair pulled up in a messy bun on the crown of my head I exit the bedroom and head for the kitchen. As I enter I feel my mouth go dry. Kelly is stood in the middle of the kitchen wearing nothing but a set of tight black boxers drinking a cup of coffee. His hair is wet and sticking slightly to his head – he's been in the shower then. Images come then –

 _Large hands press mine over my head as he bends down to press his mouth on mine as his cock pressing into me slowly. I separate our mouths so that I can tilt my head backwards with a moan as he fills me completely. He takes the opportunity to press a kiss to my neck and then in true Kelly-style bite down, sucking hard to add a hickey. I go to tell him off – I'm gonna get so much stick from the rest of Truck tomorrow now for the massive hickey prominent on my neck but as I open my mouth to say all of this I catch his eyes. Water is cascading down his back and over his shoulders, his hair is wet, sticking to his forehead, but his blue eyes are sparkling with laughter. The words in my throat turn to a moan as he uses his very nice set of abs to pull out slowly and then thrust back in hard and managing to get just the right angle to hit my g-spot before stilling inside me for a second. He continues this slow pull and hard push right on my g-spot until Casey bangs on the bathroom door and tells him to hurry up and finish fucking me so that we can leave for Molly's._

I blink and refocus my attention back to the present. He's smirking – that infuriating smirk which shows he knows exactly what I am thinking about. He sets the cup down on the table before sauntering towards the bedroom behind me, stopping to press a kiss on my cheek. 

"Gonna have some breakfast babe?"

He calls over his shoulder as he kicks the bedroom door ajar behind him. I swear under my breath as I close my eyes and take a deep breath in, trying desperately to calm myself down. But to no avail – with only kisses and limited touches from both the boys since the "Casey incident" nearly three weeks ago I am going stir crazy.

I'm washing up the discarded plates and coffee cups when Kelly decides to make an appearance again from the bedroom – at least this time he is clothed. A small part of me is disappointed after all he is hot as hell without a shirt on. A detail that Kelly knows very well – however the larger part of me that is sexually frustrated and ready to jump either of the Lieutenants is very happy that he is clothed and hiding temptation. However, Kelly clearly isn't done being a tease this morning. I try to ignore him however, he comes around the kitchen table to stand directly behind me. After a second of trying to ignore him and his gaze boring in to the back of my head I turn, drying my hands on a tea towel to face him – I know Kelly well enough to know that he is stubborn enough to stand there for the next hour and I also know that he has to be at a Lieutenants meeting at the firehouse in 10 minutes so I cave for the sake of not getting him in trouble with the Chief. I cross my arms across my chest,

"What? You have to leave - you're gonna be late!"

Kelly rolls his eyes before moving further forward pushing until he is between my legs and pulling my arms down from across my chest. He cups the side of my neck with his hand, his thumb pressing into my jaw as he tilts my head before slotting his mouth over mine. I moan slightly and press into the kiss. The other of his hands gravitates to my butt and he grips tightly. I gasp and Kelly takes advantage sliding his tongue into my mouth. He strokes his tongue along mine as he pulls me even closer to him. Just as I am getting in to the kiss, he pulls away and, tucking a stray hair behind my ear, moves backwards. He grabs his keys off of the kitchen counter before shooting me a cocky smirk and walking backwards towards the front door. I'm still pressed against the counter – my oxygen starved brain trying to catch up with the programme. I glare at him as he waves before grabbing his jacket and going out the front door with a quick,

"See you later babe"

I tip my head back against the kitchen cabinets with a thud as I try to gain my breath back and contain the urge to throw something at the door after him. I swear under my breath as I move to put the plates back in the cupboard and freeze – great another pair of underwear soaked and ruined within 30 minutes of each other. The boys really had a lot to answer for today.

 _Kelly's tongue is buried deep in my pussy and I feel my legs shake again as they nearly give out at the pleasure. He slaps a hand down on one of my ass cheeks scolding without moving his mouth. I whimper but straighten them again. I try to spread them wider however the jeans at my ankles hamper this effort and I shift slightly trying to transfer some of my weight from my feet on to the coffee table I currently have my hands on instead. I am bent from the waist forwards in the middle of the living room as Severide presses his magical tongue into my sopping wet hole again. His hands are holding me close to him as he remains seated on the sofa behind me. I feel myself start towards the edge of the precipice and again just as I get there, Kelly pulls away, licking through my folds gently bringing me down again. I cry out again as he stops just short of me cumming again for the third time in the last 30 minutes._

I chuck the TV magazine back on the coffee table with an annoyed huff as yet another memory pops into my brain. In the last hour every object in the whole apartment is causing my sex addled brain to find a memory for it. I tried to dust however I got as far as the hallway before the memory of Matt and Kelly pushing me against the hallway wall and fingering me until I came, shuddering against them still in my dress and heels came to mind.

I abandon the idea of watching the tv thus decide that laundry couldn't possible evoke any memories could it?

I move to the bedroom, open the laundry bin and tip the clothes out. Just as I move to start sorting something catches my eye – more specifically two things. Two black ties – clearly the boys had put their dress uniforms in the wash. I slid the soft material through my hands and my eyes slid shut –

 _I twist my wrists and feel the material bite into my skin. I can hear someone shifting on the sofa to my right and then the apartment goes silent again. I can hear the cars outside and the breathing from behind me as the blindfold across my eyes moves slightly. The person behind me pulls the knot tighter at the back obscuring even the ring of light at the bottom of the makeshift blindfold. The hand strokes slightly down my back causing me to shiver before I hear him to move away from me and then silence again. I shift my weight again from one knee to the other and then still as Kelly's voice breaks the silence._

" _Look at her Matt – kneeling there so good for us."_

 _Matt hums in agreement,_

" _Oh I see her Kel. Look at her pussy – she's gushing. What would you want first – her mouth or her pussy? I'd go for the mouth first – push in nice and slow and then just start fucking her throat. Hmm.. feeling her throat flex around me – nice and tight."_

 _I moan at the image – of his cock in my mouth; filling me up, limiting my breathing, his hands on either side of my face. Just thinking about it, imagining it causes me to clench my pussy on emptiness and I whimper with want._

" _Hmm… you do that, I'll finger that wet pussy. I'll slid one finger in there straight way – you'll clench against me hard, trying to pull me in further. I'll fuck you with just one until your fucking yourself down and begging me for another, then I'll slid another finger in."_

 _I'm trying to fuck myself down on air, clenching hard, whimpering near constantly and that ball of white hot release is building low in my stomach as I listen. Somehow the darkness makes their words even hotter – just hearing their words and the rustle of their clothes as they shift on the sofa._

A passing siren outside startles me out of my memory and I drop the tie instantly. I grab the washing and chuck it back in to the bin and with a kick put the bin back at the side of the room.

I wander aimlessly throughout the apartment trying to find something that won't bring back a memory and I am cussing at the boys with every curse word I know because we have had sex pretty much everywhere in the apartment; there is no place safe from these memories. I alighting again in the bedroom just staring at the bed in despair. I wanted one of them to fuck me like they used to. After our little group chat about rules and everything a couple of weeks ago I assumed that it would return to semi-normal – yet no. They refused to touch me, refused to play anymore and it was driving me insane. Then the thought hit me like a freight train – if they wouldn't initiate a scene then why shouldn't I? God knows I was horny enough.

With that thought in mind I move pull off my tank top and jeans, toeing off my socks. I grab a pillow off of the bed before kneeling on it. My knees shoulder width apart, sitting back on my haunches, hands clasped behind my back and head bowed. With that I wait. The longer the silence fills the air, the stillness surrounding me, the further I sink in to my head. It's like a veil has been pulled over my thoughts and everything is blanketed.

I wait, wet and wanting for my Masters to come home.


	7. Chapter 6

**The warnings: this story will contain spanking of an adult, BSDM theme, polyamourous relationship between three people.**

 _As ever please review or PM me with your rave comments or constructive criticism._

 _As ever I am not a BDSM expert so don't take everything I say as gospel – and if you are a BDSM expert – please give me a yell if anything in this incorrect!_

 _Hope you enjoy._

 _All the love_

 _K xx_

 **Matt's POV**

"Well that was a waste of a good day off!"

Kelly's first words to me as he stepped out of his car and lingered on the sidewalk were nothing that I didn't already know or agree with. What was the point of a Lieutenant's meeting when all we did was listen as the CFD complained about the amount of paperwork that was done incorrectly or outstanding (unfortunately they were yet to decided to reducing the 5-ton stacks of paperwork we had for each call) and to complain even more about the state of the trucks and houses. The only good thing that had come from the meetings so far as the new masks that Kelly had fought tooth and nail to get from the CFD budget- and that had been months ago.

"Tell me about it!"

I reply as we start up the stairs towards the apartment.

"I mean why bring us in just to complain – how about "Nice job" once in a while?"

"You wouldn't agree even if they said that! You hate praise about your work. What was it you said last time? Something about liking to do your job without the glory and parade?"

"Shut up. I just think a "good job" every once in a while, wouldn't hurt!"

We gripe and counter each other all the way up the stairs and along the hallway to the apartment. As we enter Kelly yells out to Olivia that we were home. Toeing off my boots, I turn. The apartment is quiet – too quiet. There is no sound of movement or a reply from Olivia –

"Did Liv say she was going out today to you?"

I query to Kelly, after all I had left early this morning to finish some last-minute paperwork at the house.

"Nope, not to me"

Was the answer as Kelly dropped his keys on the hall table and turned to frown at me in concern as we moved down the hall. I push the bedroom door open a little as we pass to see if Olivia is sleeping on the bed and see her. I tap Kelly's arm and point. The intake of breath from beside me is reciprocated as we both stare.

Olivia is kneeling on the floor, arms behind her back, head bowed. The light from outside is streaming in the window and bathing her in light. The sunlight is illuminating her bare skin and making her have an almost ethereal glow to her.

"Liv? Babe?"

Kelly breaks our trace-like state first, moving forward into the bedroom. Liv tips her head up for the first time since we had been home and her pupils are blown wide. There is a small ring of green around the dark pupil with a slightly glassy look to them. She's swaying slightly as she is kneeling – she's deep then. I shoot a look at Kelly questioning how long she has been kneeling on the floor for. Not that the sight didn't have me hard in a nano-second, it could be detrimental to her health being under this long with no-one here. Kelly moves, holding out a hand,

"Come on lovey let's get you upright a second"

Olivia whimpers a second and shakes her head – misinterpreting the move as an abortion of the scene however, Kelly takes her hand and tugs slightly. She stands to her feet still swaying from side to side a little. Her knees aren't red and, as I get nearer, I can still feel the warmth on her skin – she hasn't been there for too long then.

Kelly tips her chin up with one finger before asking,

"Safewords – say 'em to me and Matt."

She blinks for a minute, just looking at Kelly before repeating back

"Red for full stop, Yellow for pause or slow down, Green for keep going and I snap my fingers twice if I'm gagged."

Olivia rolls them off quick.

"Good girl. Now pop up on the bed and lay on your back for us."

Olivia nods slightly and starts towards the bed. Kelly turns to glance at me, silently questioning if I'm good.

I nod even though I'm not sure. I'm not sure if I'm ready to be back in this headspace again so soon after The Incident. Unsure of me being in this position of power. As these thoughts cross my mind, Kelly moves towards me. I feel his hand slid around my neck and his lips meet mine softly. We kiss for a second, lips moving in sync as I feel Kelly try to infuse his confidence through his kiss to me. He presses his tongue into my mouth, stroking my tongue to come and play. As I join in, he backs down a little, coaxing me to take the lead.

As my breath ran out, I pull back from the kiss. Kelly's hand stays my neck as he rests his forehead against mine. I close my eyes and soak in the warmth that he is emitting. He is just half an inch taller than me in height but with his hand on my neck holding my body close to him I feel surrounded by him - his warmth, his scent, his hand on my neck, his forehead against mine. It's like he is trying to fuse us into one person. Kelly pulls back first, moving his hand to assert pressure to the side of my neck that he is gripping, pushing my head to the side as he moves his head to my collar bone. His stubble scratches across my neck causing a sharp intake of breath on my part which is knocked out of me a second later as, instead of kissing my neck as usual, Kelly bites down hard on to my collar bone - sucking hard, pulling the blood to the surface. His thumb brushes across my newly forming hickey as he moves his hand away as he steps back with a smug grin on his face. He then trails the hand down my chest and as his hand settles over the growing bulge in my jeans, he moves to mutter in my ear,

"Let's get our girl sorted and then I'll do something about this"

With a slight stroke of my cock through my jeans and a nip of my earlobe, Severide moves backwards out of my space. His baby blues find mine for a second, holding my gaze for a second, a small smirk tugs his mouth before he turns away back to our girl laying in the middle of the bed watching us.

 **Olivia's POV**

It's always hot as hell to see Kelly and Matt like this together. I'm still floating somewhere just outside of my head as I watch them. I dig my hands into the sheets at my sides to stop my hands from wandering down to my aching pussy; I know the rules on that but as Kelly begins to roam from Matt's mouth down his neck; my hand strays from the sheets to my stomach. It brushes across my lower stomach lightly, trying to resist the urge to go lower. I automatically suck in my breath at the tickling sensation of my nails scratching across my stomach. A hand grips mine, stopping the movement across my abdomen. Unaware that my eyes had fallen shut, I open them to find Matt kneeling next to me on the bed, holding my wrists. Noticing my attention on him, he smiles slightly and grips down a bit harder, the pressure on my wrists increase and I moan. Then I jump as a length of rope lands on my stomach. I quickly turn my head to find Kelly moving on to the bed with another length of rope in his hand.

"Jumpy babe?"

He chuckles as Matt grabs the rope off of my stomach and lets go of one of my wrists in favour of looping the rope around my left wrist instead. Kelly mirrors him on my right side. My head is still spinning, trying to catch up with the rope appearing out of nowhere. When my mind is caught up, both of my wrists are tied securely to the bedposts. I give them a tug anyway but, not unusually with two well-trained firefighters on hand, they didn't give any. I feel a finger under my chin as Kelly gently moves me to look at him -

"Safeword?"

I blink at him as the fog falling over my brain halts, it takes a minute for my mouth to remember how to work, and I manage to stutter out,

"G..Gr… Green sir"

He hums in approval before moving off the bed again towards the chest of drawers at the side of the room. My attention is turned from Kelly as a set of fingers run their way up the inside of my leg. My legs fall open as Matt's fingers reach my pussy. His forefinger flicks across my clit briefly before he runs it through my folds, pushing slightly at my hole. His finger circles my hole a few more times as I squirm against him before he sinks one finger in me slowly. Inch by inch he slides his finger in, too slow for my liking. Just as he has that, too slim, finger fully in me, he starts to slid it out just as slow. I moan in frustration and try to grind down on him. The finger disappears completely at that and I whimper at the empty feeling. A sharp slap hits my inside thigh,

"Don't be greedy. You get what we give you"

Was the only warning I got before two fingers are thrust back in hard. I jerk in my restraints and yelp in surprise. Matt scissors his fingers quickly before sliding them out and then sliding a third finger in. The stretch is slightly too fast and quick, the burn only fuels me to writhe more; pulling at the rope to arch my back upwards off of the bed trying to chase Matt's fingers as they withdraw and leave me empty again. I clench down hard on nothing and cry out in frustration and need. Again, something pushes at my hole but this time as I bear down on it, it flares out more than Matt's fingers. It's hard, cold and slippery with lube. I squirm as I feel the unforgiving plastic be pushed inside of me. I flick my eyes open again and focus on Matt and Kelly now kneeling one either side of me on the bed. Kelly leans down to my ear as his fingers start to draw circles on the inside of my thigh,

"Now you're gonna be a good girl and lay here for a bit whilst me and Matt play a bit. Only one rule for now babe – no cumming without permission and I don't think you've earned that permission yet hmm…. Safeword?"

He removes his hand from my leg and waits –

"Green sir"

"Good"

Is the only warning I get before he moves his hand between my thighs and I feel the hard object inside of me begin to vibrate. I arch with a sharp cry – the vibrations are just short of my g-spot and are too low to get me off, but just high enough to drive me insane. Matt moves to place a pillow behind my head, effectively propping my head upright enough to watch him and Kelly as they move off of the bed and to the right-hand side of the room. They are both in plain view and I moan as I realise what they are going to do as Kelly, slides a hand up Matt's chest. I'm gonna be laying here getting ramped up with no chance of being allowed to orgasm in the near future as they decided to play with each other.

 **Kelly's POV**

It had taken a while at the start of the relationship for me and Matt to figure out what we were. We knew that we both loved Olivia - that was the easy part. We also knew that we wanted to keep having sex with all three of us involved. However, the hard part had come when we were alone. With me being a notorious ladies man and both of us being very Alpha-male-ish we were stuck in a slightly awkward situation. We worked well as a team however, neither of us had ever really thought of the relationship that we would have, and neither of us identified as bi-sexual at all. We had tried at the start to take it in turns at being fucked yet, with neither of us liking anal sex that much we eventually gave up. However, as time had progressed and Olivia had knocked our heads together many times we both had come to a realisation. We could love each other and want each other without requiring us to have penetrative sex with each other. Me and Matt were content with kissing, the occasional blow job or hand job. We didn't need to have sex together to "justify" our love for each other and our relationship. Even with this in mind though - Matt was usually the instigator; I had never started anything like this before with Matt on his own.

I move forwards to stand in front of Casey - trying to block Olivia's moans out for a second. Trusting Matt to keep an ear out for her as I press a hand on to Matt's abs. His abdomen twitches at the contact and I smirk slightly as a shudder runs through his body as my hand moves up his body towards his nipples. I feel his hands moved from his side to grab on to my hips bringing my body closer to him. As I lean in to press a gentle kiss on his pecs, I feel Matt grip on to my belt loops and pull my lower body flush against him. I moan against his skin as our cocks brush against each other. The friction is so good with so little friction for so long. I move one of my thighs between Matts and push upwards. He groans out as my thigh pushes against his cock. I feel him begin to grind downwards and as he does so my cock drags against his hip. We begin to grind against each other in earnest now, Matt pushing upwards as I rock forwards. Our jeans still on providing rough friction against the slid of our bodies. My hands are gripping Matt's shoulders as his leave imprints on my hips. The need to cum is building fast, my cock is throbbing. With a groan I pull backwards, trying not to cum in my jeans like a randy 17 year old. That was not my plan for this just yet. I wanted to make this good for Matt - better than a quick grinding session - however hot that was. Matt tries to pull me back to him again however, I move my hands to his jeans, pulling the button out and pushing at them. Matt's brain gets with the programme and his hands fall from my belt loops to his own, pushing the jeans to the floor. He goes to push his boxers off too however, I move to stop him.

My knees hit the carpet and my hands move to help Matt out of his jeans. I nose along the outline of his cock in his thin cotton boxers. I can feel the heat of him, smell the fragrance that is uniquely Matt and feel his cock twitch as I mouth at the wet spot on his boxers. I never thought that I would enjoy giving head - as a purely straight guy until I started this relationship it wasn't something I had thought of doing at all. Yet on my knees in front of Matt, I wanted to suck him good. Get him moaning above me, his hands in my hair and his cock filling my throat. Something about this first scene after the Incident made me need to feel Matt back in control again. I grasp the waistband of his boxers with my teeth and pull them down, letting my teeth scratch against his skin a little.

I feel Matt curse above me and one of his hands move to cup the side of my face gently. I abandon Matt's boxers' half way down his thigh and return to his cock. I gently press a light kiss on the head before moving to take it in to my mouth. I manage to get at least half of Matt's cock in to my mouth on the first go, smoothing my tongue along the vein on the underside as I pull backwards again. I move down again, trying to relax the back of my throat and get more in. I keep going, pushing him further and further in as I work his cock, bobbing my head fast. My hands move to stroke the section of his cock that I can't fit in my mouth. Matt's restraint ends as I flick my tongue across the head of his cock, digging in to the slit a little at the end. His hands stop being passive at that point, moving to the back of my head, threading themselves through my hair and pulling slightly at it. Matt is beginning to thrust in to my mouth in time with my bobbing and together we set a nice rhythm. My cock hangs forgotten for the minute between my thighs as I kneel. I must look a sight at this point – cock hard and red swinging between my thighs; hands gripping Matt's hips slightly; my mouth wrapped around half of Matt's cock and spit dribbling slightly out of the sides of my mouth as Matt thrusts in again. I moan at the image of us I can see in my head – Matt jerks at the moan,

"Hell, Kelly! You've got such a good mouth on you huh! Just like that…"

Matt keeps a running commentary as he edges towards his orgasm. I move one hand from his cock to his balls. Gently rolling them between my fingers, massaging them slightly. As they draw up, I move my head backwards slightly until only the head of Matt's cock is in my mouth and I start to hum. The vibrations are what make Matt lose it. Suddenly the grip on my hair becomes slightly painful, Matt is crying out above me and hot seed is flooding my mouth. I swallow it, gently sucking him to prolong the orgasm as long as possible until Matt lets go of my hair and pushes me gently away. I move upwards, wrapping an arm around his waist as he sags slightly.

I can feel Matt come back to himself, as his hand moves to wrap itself around my cock. I moan loudly as he grips me just shy of too tight but to my annoyance doesn't move his hand. He moves to stand behind me, turning me slightly to look at the bed. Olivia is writhing, a sheen of sweat is making her body glow and the most delicious sounding whimpers are being emitted from her as she moves her head from side to side. I catch sight of her eyes and see her pupils are blown wide. She has tears pooling at the sides of her eyes threatening to fall at any minute.

"Look at our girl Kel. Doesn't she look hot as hell? Think she deserves this?"

With that he squeezes my cock. I manage to abort my instinct to thrust into Matt's grip and nod; not trusting my voice at that moment.

We move to the bed and Matt moves to turn off the vibrator. Olivia cries out as he pulls the same from her. I move to sink two fingers in to her. Her pussy clenches down hard, gripping my fingers in a vice like grip. I twist them, trying to loosen her a little. Before sliding them out again.

I feel the bed dip as Matt moves to duck under one of the ropes and settles himself behind Olivia. Effectively pulling her into his lap. He runs a hand down her side, trying to calm her down a little before hooking his hands under her thighs and moving her legs to the outside of his. He leaves his hands on the inside of her thighs. She is spread open – her pussy on full display to me. I grip the base of my cock hard trying to stave off the impending orgasm that I know is coming just from the sight alone. Olivia mews slightly at being spread open so completely but soon quietens when I move into the space between her legs. I move towards the bedside table but I feel a hand grip the top of my cock and as I look down Casey rolls a condom on me with a wicked twist of his hand that has me fucking thin air and groaning as his hand disappears.

I move, effectively pinning Olivia between me and Matt as I hover with my cock on her hole. I stop before I thrust in and grunt out quickly,

"O – safeword?"

I am shaking with the need to thrust into the warm clenching hole beneath me. Yet the newly negotiated rules have to come first; Olivia's safety and wellbeing has to come first and I pause.

"Green, God Green please…"

At the first words I breath a sigh of relief and push in.

 **Olivia's POV**

I'm floating. It is the only way to describe it. I feel Kelly push in with a hard thrust and pleasure runs up my spine as his cock stretches me fully. He hits my spot with unnerving accuracy and I arch with another cry. I feel so exposed like this – spread wide open, held wide open by Matt's hands. Yet at the same time, I feel safe – with Matt behind me and Kelly in front, they envelope my senses. I press my head back on to Matt's shoulder as Kelly thrusts in again. One of Matt's hands moves to my breasts, pulling the hard nipple slightly. Everything is becoming too much, the hard thrusts, the pleasure as my g-spot is nailed bang on thrust after thrust, the twist of my nipple and I clench hard. Trying desperately to not cum without permission, I don't realise I'm speaking until I hear myself –

"Please…. Oh god… urgh… so close… sirs… please"

I feel Kelly's thrusts stutter and I feel him begin to cum.

"Cum for us"

Was the words whispered in my ear by Matt and I shatter. My eyes shut and whiteness bursts in my eyes, everything is happening at once. Then blackness.

It takes a while for me to come around completely and even then, I'm still floating around in my head. Things trickle back in, like the soreness of my throat from crying out; the fact that my hands are no longer tied; the softness of the duvet tucked over me; the cool water sliding down my throat and the warm hand on the back of my neck helping me drink. A warm body is behind me and a warm body slides in to the bed in front of me and they hold me. I am still shaking from the effects of one of the best orgasms of my life and I'm so happy that I instigated this. I close my eyes again and relax into their arms and let their monologue soothe me in to sleep -

"Such a good girl… so good for us…perfect… amazing…"

 **Matt's POV**

I look over Olivia's sleeping form between me and Kelly. Kelly smiles at me as I lean over Olivia and kiss him gently. Somehow, Kelly always knows what to do. He managed to get me to lead this scene without leading the scene. He managed to restore some of the confidence I had lost.

"Still didn't manage to do double penetration this time"

Kelly whispers to me –

"Well, maybe someone shouldn't have blown most of my brains out of my cock and we may have!"

Was my whispered retort. I feel his hand move across Olivia to push me slightly, I grab it and press a kiss on his knuckles. He laughs slightly before pushing me –

"Go cook something look – it's nearly lunch time and I'm starving now!"

"Why me? You cook something if you're hungry"

"I'm comfy!"

I roll my eyes and climb out of bed, pulling on my jeans and t-shirt again as quietly as possible.

I turn at the door and look back. Olivia is curled against Kelly's side, hand on his chest and he is curled around her. Still whispering endearments in her ear even though her breathing suggests that she has fallen asleep by now. I feel a smile tug my lips as I turn into the hallway to go find what we had in the kitchen to cook.

 _I hope you enjoyed the same!_

 _As ever leave a review below or as ever PM me if you have any constructive criticism or nice words for me!_

 _I hope to update this again soon! Again, sorry for such a long wait for this chapter._

 _All the love_

 _K. xxx_


	8. Chapter 7

**The warnings: this story will contain spanking of an adult, BSDM theme, polyamourous relationship between three people.**

 _As ever please review or PM me with your rave comments or constructive criticism._

 **Just a heads up – this chapter will also contain mentions of child abuse. Don't read if it is going to trigger anything!**

 _Hope you enjoy._

 _All the love_

 _K xx_

I swallow the last of my Long Island Ice Tea just as Aiden downs the rest of his Corona. Aiden is motioning Otis for another refill and pulling some notes out of his pocket before I even have a chance to open my purse that is set on the bar between us.

"I was paying for this round?!"

Aiden shrugs,

"My treat -it's not often I get to spend time with my best friend so shut up and drink your girly drink."

I pull a face at him before shoving him in the ribs with my elbow. I snort as Aiden almost falls off of his chair. This in turn causes him to push me; we end up leaning against each other laughing until my sides hurt. After the weirdness of the last few weeks with Kelly and Matt, it is nice to be able to relax and have fun with someone who knows me just as well as I know myself. Me and Aiden had been childhood friends from Kindergarten onwards and we had stayed in touch when he had enlisted and I had started the Academy. It was the first time since his first leave almost 3 years ago now that he was in Chicago for his leave rather than visiting his family in New York like usual.

"Do you remember the Senior Ditch Day when we all went out to the lake and built that campfire?"

I nod - it was one of my favourite memories from high school. We have ditched school and gone to this lake that was about an hour from Chicago. We had swam in the lake and as the night fell, we had built this massive campfire and sat around telling ghost stories and making smores. It had been one of the best days in history.

"We should totally do that again before I have to ship out again in a few weeks. Get the whole gang back together - like a reunion. Only - you know, with no cheesy music and people that you hated from school!"

"Sounds awesome to me - only if we bring better alcohol this time though!"

I rib him - with only the selection of his dad's liquor cabinet last time we had been stuck with some out of date red wine and a couple of cans of lager.

We laugh and I quickly grab for my purse as we go to order another round.

I stumble into my apartment at 2am - trying to keep the noise down in order to not wake Kelly and Matt. After all we did have a shift tomorrow - or was it this morning now? I frown and then shake my head trying to stop the hallway from spinning quite so much. I should never have agreed to those shots but it was only one night. Here was to hoping for a quiet shift today - after all I was gonna need it with the hang over that I was gonna have.

 **Matt's POV**

I pull the door closed behind me as I enter Kelly's officer quarters and slump down on the bed with a sigh. Kelly turns immediately - the sighing and flopping on to beds is usually more his style. I'm usually more of a quiet brooder over things; however, today was more of a sighing kinda day.

"You okay?"

I hum in agreement, with Olivia out of sight, the tightness in my groin was going down.

"Liv's being a tease."

Kelly grunts in agreement and turns back to his paperwork satisfied that I wasn't having a major breakdown or dying.

"What's she doing?"

"Making innuendos, palming me in the equipment room and then again behind the island when we were getting coffee."

"She was parading around the locker room this morning in her bra and panties when I was in there earlier, pushing herself up against me. I think our girl is trying to push us into something."

It was going to be hard to finish the rest of the shift with Olivia in this kind of mood. Usually we would have cornered her in the locker room or in one of the officer quarters and fucked the tease right out of her. But as one of our new rules was no sexual activity/scenes at the firehouse, that wasn't going to be an option.

"Well one of us is going to have to say something Kel, I can't put up with her doing this for the rest of the shift!"

"Whoever she starts with next should say something."

"Sure"

I sigh and swing my legs off of Kelly's bunk and stand - I was going to have to go and closet myself in my own office to finish my own paperwork for the chief and wait for my hard-on was going to go down. I was hoping that I could eke out the paperwork to take up most of the next 7 hours of shift so that I wasn't in Liv's line of fire. I didn't want to be the one that said anything because then I was gonna be responsible for the punishment that she was gonna get when she got home for the teasing. Hopefully, she would go for Kelly next.

 **Kelly's POV**

The Officer Quarters door shuts with a click and I sigh slightly. I knew right then that the task of punishing Olivia was going to fall on me. Matt was pulling back again - just like the scene last week. This had to stop - I needed this to be an equal partnership again, not me leading and Matt trailing in my wake. I could understand his skittishness regarding the punishment, after all the last one had almost broken the relationship, however he had to get back in the saddle so to speak. He couldn't hide from this forever. I would take the lead for this one last punishment and then Casey was going to have to get over this and step up.

I hear the door of my office click open again, I ignore as the person steps inside. There was only two people that would come into my office without knocking - Matt and Olivia. It had taken Olivia less than half an hour to notice Matt's disappearance from the common room and come to find one of us. Her body spray scent wafted to my nose as she moved to stand behind me. From outside of the office it would look like she was reading a report over my shoulder, however, the frosted glass part of the window hid Liv's hand as it migrated around my waist and under my t-shirt. As her hand moved up my abs I tensed slightly. Her hand stopped its movement as she felt my stomach stiffen at her touch.

Just as I thought she had taken the hint and her hand removed itself from the inside of my shirt. I relaxed again however, Liv didn't step back. I could feel the warmth of her breath on the back of my neck and then her lips on the side of my neck. She was being obvious now - if anyone walked into the bunk room and looked over, they would see us through the glass. Her lips moved to caress slightly under the collar of my shirt to my collarbone. Here she sucked hard, pulling the blood to the surface in a crude attempt at a hickey. Just as she sucked, her hand fell to my crotch, pressing down. Her proximity already had me at half mast, but the hickey attempt and the heel of her hand on the head of my cock was enough to send my straight to full mast. I growled at her, pushing my chair backwards; knocking her off of balance and forcing her to step back and let go of me.

I grab both of her hands in one of mine, turning her so that my body is blocking prying eyes from seeing the scene we were creating. I saw Casey turning in his office at the bang of my chair hitting the floor slightly as I had stood. I felt his eyes on me and Liv - watching, but not participating.

I grip Liv's chin, forcing her to look at me. Her green eyes hit my blues ones. She squirms in my grip, however, I have a tight hold on her chin and wrists.

"STOP! You want a rise, you're not getting one. You want your behaviour noticed. Consider it noticed. We will deal with this at home after shift. Get out of my office and go run a drill with Hermann… NOW!"

I say the words low, but she can hear them well enough. She stills, a bob of the head is the only indication that she has heard and understands what I am saying. I drop her chin and wrists and she moves towards the door quickly. I see a movement in the corner of my eye and watch in my peripheral vision as Casey turns back to his work again. I turn and watch as Liv moves across the bunk room again – she turns at the end, looking back at me.

 **Olivia's POV**

My eyes found Kelly's. That glow is back in his eyes, that glint of promise. It makes me squirm; I know the effect of that glint. He raises his eyebrows before mouthing "later" at me before moving to sit down back to his desk. My stomach turns slightly. Maybe it hadn't been the best idea to wind him and Matt up on shift - but really what did they expect? I never said I was going to be submissive and obedient all of the time.

Any way it had been far too long since my last good punishment and I am craving that feeling. That red-hot painful feeling after the punishment, the achy feeling that comes the day after, the slight twinge as you sit down - the feeling that represented being owned, being cared for. I hadn't felt that in so long that maybe I had pushed Kelly and Matt into it. God- I was really topping from the bottom lately. I seemed to be pushing them into a lot the last month or so - from kisses to the scene to this punishment.

I frown as I move from the bunk room out on to the apparatus floor. I hover outside of the common room a second but Hermann looks busy talking business with Gabby and Otis. I shift from one foot to another and realise that my little game with the Lieutenants has me just as worked up. I thought for sure that this kind of behaviour would crack their little rule. After all, it wouldn't be the first time that we had fucked in the firehouse. I sigh slightly, it was going to be a long 7 hours. At least the hangover had subsided but as the turning in my stomach came back at the thought of the punishment that lay at the end of the 7 hours, the shot of Tequila and Long Island Ice Teas decided to rebel against the water and aspirin I had taken that morning. I turned and moved around the engines and out into the sunshine. I stop to lean on the wall outside, dropping my head back on to the brickwork and shutting my eyes for a second, pulling in breathes of clear cold air in to my lungs.

"Ollie!"

I look up to find Aiden walking towards me. At 6'2 he stands a full couple of inches above me, blocking out the sunshine as he crosses the forecourt. His black hair is flopping over his forehead and his dark green eyes sparkle like emeralds out of his tanned skin. I feel a smile break across my face,

"Aidy!"

I run towards him, pulling him into a hug. I had only seen him early this morning, yet his presence settled me more than anything right now. His cologne was the same as it was in high school, it fills my nostrils as his arms come around me holding me close like a blanket. I always felt so small with Aiden with his height and the muscles that he had suddenly grown in senior year. Hugging Aiden always made me think of my home town, of my old friends, of coke and rum, of days by the lake and star lit nights by bonfires.

I felt his chest heave under my cheek and I heard a rumble of laughter come out of him.

"We have an audience."

I turn to see faces retreat from the windows that were in the common room. Obviously, our yelling of nicknames had triggered an overwatch from everyone in the house. I laugh along with Aiden as I grab his hand and pull him towards the house,

"No backing out now. Come on, come meet everyone."

 **Matt POV**

Jealousy twisted my gut hard as I watched Olivia run across the forecourt to this man. He had a Severide-look about him - tall, muscular, dark hair and shining eyes – just Olivia's type. It had always been painfully close to the centre of my thoughts that Olivia picked Severide first. She had liked Kelly first. Maybe that was her type I though as this guy wrapped his arms around Liv, pulling her in to him. The many different ways of breaking his arms suddenly seemed to come to mind as I watched the hug go on for longer than was strictly necessary.

"Might wanna let go of the cup there Lieutenant."

Hermann's voice penetrated the red mist that had descended over me, I look down to find my knuckles white. I relax my hand, watching as the blood flowed back into my hand and I take a deep breath. I'm not usually the jealous type. I nod at Hermann silently thanking him from stopping me from breaking a mug and try to push the thoughts out of my head. I was being irrational – Olivia was allowed to have friends, she was allowed to have close guy friends. Me and Kelly weren't that controlling over her; I vowed until the man had crossed the line I would be cool about this.

The door to the common room swing open to show Liv and this "Aidy" guy. Liv is pulling him in and heads for the kitchen - asking behind her if he still took his coffee the same. He follows her and leans against the counter watching her. He says something and she laughs; it occurs to me that me and Kelly hadn't made her laugh like that for a very long time. I feel the red mist start to descend.

I turn, leaving my coffee on the counter and walk out the room. There was something about this guy that provoked a cave-man style reaction that Olivia would not appreciate. Better to keep my distance for now before I did something drastic like breaking this man's fingers.

 **Olivia's POV**

I turn just as the doors swing shut behind Matt's retreating form. My stomach sinks slightly - I had wanted to introduce Matt to Aiden; and Kelly too if he would stop hiding in his office. Shrugging slightly, I pass the steaming cup of black tar to Aiden before turning to add copious amounts of milk and sugar to my cup.

We sink down on to the chairs as I introduce him to everyone in the common room - the only ones that aren't there are the two people that I really want to introduce Aiden to. Kelly and Matt remain noticeably absent from the meeting. Aiden always had that easy kind of manner that made him quick to get to know and very likeable. He also could talk about anything - he talked about everything in the next 3 hours from truck engines to casinos in Vegas all the way to his navy background. The bells were blissfully silent and lounging against Aiden in the common room with the rumble of his voice filling the air, I felt more relaxed than I had in a while. The rest of the shift passes in a blur – no bells ring and Aiden entertains the group. He tries to coax me back out to Mollys' at the end of the shift however, in the remaining grips of my hangover and the impending punishment in my mind I rain check the idea; kissing Aiden's cheek and promising to text him later.

I hover at the firehouse exit waiting for Kelly and Matt. They appear a few minutes later, laughing about some joke. I smiled slightly, trying to assess the mood. Kelly's lips quirked up at the corner before he grabbed my bag off of my shoulder and I felt Matt's hand at the centre of my back not leading just settled there. Evidently, they hadn't forgiven or forgotten my antics on shift though as I was pushed into the backseat of Kelly's mustang with Matt taking the passenger seat.

As we enter the apartment, Kelly points me towards the bedroom –

"In there, strip, kneel and wait. We'll come to see to that punishment in a minute."

I nod, already moving into the bedroom, pulling off my socks as I go.

I hear someone follow me in and watch Kelly out of the corner of my eye as he grabs some clothes and a cushion from the bed. He drops the cushion on the floor near the bottom of the bed and heads towards the hallway. The bathroom door shutting a minute later confirms my theory of him having a shower. I shake my head, kneel on the cushion and close my eyes.

The floor is hard beneath my bare knees as I shift slightly. I can hear Matt in the kitchen, bashing about the pans; the shower is still running in the bathroom down the hall, so Kelly is still in there. I shift again - the clock had been set downwards on the dresser. One of the boys must have come back in and done that when my eyes were closed so that I couldn't see the time passing. It felt like 30 minutes or so had passed since we had come home, but I didn't have such a good grasp of time with no reference to go by. I knew they were drawing out the waiting, it was a common tactic by both of them. Still, the wait made my stomach flip.

 **Kelly POV**

Matt was chopping tomatoes when walked back into the kitchen, from the view of the doorway he seemed calm enough. However, as I moved closer I could see the tense set of his shoulders, the way his muscles were bunched tightly and his preoccupation showed as he narrowly missed cutting himself with the knife. I moved behind him, slowly removing the knife from his grasp, I wrapped my arms around his middle. His hands twist into mine as we stand there for a minute, holding each other.

"We need to talk after this."

Matt sighs slightly and nods,

"I know"

He goes to say something and then stops, his mouth hangs open like he is trying to speak but the words just won't come.

"I'll lead with this punishment okay. I just can't take charge of this relationship forever Matt. We're meant to be a team in this."

He turns, nodding at my words. His hand cups the side of face and pulls me in for a soft kiss.

With that, we turn towards the hall and the bedroom; we had left Olivia to stew long enough. We pause in the doorway to the bedroom, Liv is kneeling, head down, hands clasped behind her back. The picture of perfect submission; if only that has been of her own free will rather than trying to appease us before her punishment. We move forward in tandem into the room, Matt splits off to lean against the wall the other side of the room - a silent observer more than a participant. I could feel the nervous energy crackling in the air. I place a hand on Liv's head, settling my nerves slightly and trying to settle hers too. She arches into my touch, I stroke her hair back from her face to find her eyes closed, a picture of serenity. She doesn't look scared so that is a good sign - after all this will be her first punishment after The Incident.

I settle backwards onto the bed behind us, shifting to get myself a steady footing. Liv turns slightly resting her cheek again the inside of my thigh, nuzzling against my jeans lightly. Her eyes are open now but her pupils are blown wide. She's deep in subspace; my stomach twists as I realise she's acting slightly sub-starved. That's me and Matt's fault entirely - I harden my resolve to talk this out with Matt, his confidence issues are causing hard to Liv now. With his reluctance to step up and my inexperience we have been ignoring what Liv needs from us.

I shift my attention back to Liv for the moment and motion for her to stand up. Just as she does so, she sways and almost falls. I dart an arm out to steady her however, Matt is there first. He manages to get an arm on Liv's shoulders, keeping her on her feet. His arm stays around her shoulder as her helps her to move downwards over my knees. He doesn't let go entirely until she is completely settled. Our eyes meet for a second and I see a flash of guilt in his eyes before he looks away again. He retreats back to the wall as I shift Liv's weight more forward and adjust my grip on her more. With that, I begin. My hand slaps down hard. Unlike Matt, I lecture as I go and start hard rather than built it up.

Liv starts hard as my slap hits her bare butt. A red handprint rises in the second that I pull back, before I strike again. I do a round of 10 hard strikes before I pull my strength in a bit and start to talk.

"We had a rule - no funny business of any kind whilst on shift. You were aware of the stipulations of that rule. You knew that that included teasing from either party. Are you recalling that conversation sweetheart?"

I don't have to wait long for a response, within the next two smacks she whimpers her answer,

"Yes sir."

"And what did you do today to earn this punishment?"

"Tease both of you sir"

"That's right. Were you meant to do that?"

"No sir"

I move to pepper her sitspots with stinging slaps that cause her to whine and wiggle in my grasp.

"No, you weren't. No playing on shift means no playing on shift. No matter how antsy you are, no matter what. It's distracting and therefore dangerous! You need something – tell us and we'll sort out playtime when we get home. Not before!"

"I'm sorry Sir"

With that Olivia begins to cry and I stop spanking. I move to help her sit up. She shifts so that she is leaning her left side into my shoulder and I feel the bed dip. Matt has moved from his centennial position by the wall and has sat the other side of Liv. His arm wraps around her too, boxing her in with out bodies.

I feel her breath ease out slightly and I shift her to lay backwards on the bed. Matt covers her with a blanket and we move silently out of the room.

 **Matt's POV**

I turn in the doorway to watch Liv sleep. Kelly's arms wrap around my midsection and his head settles on my shoulder. He presses a kiss on the side of my neck before moving to wrap a hand around my wrist and pulls me away from the door backwards in to the living room.

He grabs two cups off of the draining board and fills them with coffee and sets them on the table before shoving a chair in my direction. I take the hint and drop into the chair, pull a cup towards me and settle my gaze on the steaming liquid, avoiding Kelly's eyes.

"Matt? I need you to stop hiding from this relationship. I don't mind stepping in if you need time. But I need reassurance that your gonna step up again. This needs to be a 50/50 relationship."

"I know"

I sigh, I run my finger around the edge of the cup a few times before speaking again.

"I just… don't trust myself. I feel like every time I take control I'm gonna hurt her again. I don't deserve the trust that you both are putting in me."

"We forgave you weeks ago Matt – what is it going to take for you to forgive yourself?"

"You both just accepted me again – nothing happened! It's not enough. I nearly shattered this whole relationship and you both just forgave me in seconds!"

I hear Kelly hum slightly and then the chair across from me scrap as he stands.

"Let me think about it. How long's dinner gonna take? I'm starving and I beat Liv is when she wakes"

With that short dismissal, I move to lit the stove.

It's four hours later that Kelly brings up the topic again. Liv's wandered off to have a bath and I'm trying to focus on a hockey game. However, I couldn't tell you the score if my life depended on it and the beer that I opened an hour ago is still full.

"What about a punishment?"

I turn to him as he flops down on the sofa beside me.

"I think Liv's been through enough."

"Not her! Idiot. You. Punish you for your mistake. It's what we would do with Liv if she felt the way you're describing to me. You'll feel better afterwards and feel like you've paid enough for your mistake."

I feel a cold shiver run down my spine, before I speak however, Kelly beats me to it.

"Look – if it gonna bring some bad memories up then say so. I won't push you into anything Matt."

His hand closes over mine, working its way in between my clasped hands to grip on to one of them tightly.

"Would you be punishing me?"

My voice is small, I can't look at Kelly's face.

"I don't know. To be honest I hadn't thought the whole thing out. I just seemed like the most logical option. I don't know if I'd be comfortable punishing you – you're my partner in this. I feel like it would throw the dynamic off."

I nod,

"I agree."

Silence rains for a few minutes, then a thought strikes me.

"What about Drew?"

"Drew?"

Kelly frowns slightly – "Drew, your mentor?"

"Yeah. I'd trust him to punish me. And that way we're not messing up our dynamic."

Kelly's silent for a few more minutes and then he nods.

"I don't know if I like the idea of another guy touching you. But I know I couldn't do this. Call Drew. Let's get his opinion on this."

 **Kelly's POV**

It takes us three days and some serious panic attacks on Matt's part to get tonight. Some serious talks about boundaries had come up and some crockery had been sacrificed by me in anger at hearing what Matt's dad had done to him as a child. He had hinted at some stuff – but Matt was closed off about his childhood. Nothing was shared without some serious prying and prodding first. Talking about it had caused some serious frightening scenes of Matt shaking and crying, curled up in a ball on the sofa. It was heart-wrenching and scary as hell to see the usually capable and touch firefighter reduced to a sobbing ball. It had taken some real guts for him to let it out though.

We had found a plan that me, Matt and Drew could deal with. I was yet to meet this Drew in person, however he seemed reassuring enough on the phone. Matt seemed to trust him and that was good enough for me. We had settled on tonight – with no shift tomorrow it seemed as good a night as any. We then had a day to put the pieces of Matt that might be shaken loose in the punishment back together. I was under no illusions that this was not going to pull on some deep set issues that Matt had a habit of avoiding like the plague.

Liv's out with Aiden for the night and she won't be back until tomorrow lunch at best. We had asked her if she wanted to be there but she had declined. She felt weird about watching Matt be punished. She had wanted to spend the night with Aiden and some old friends anyway. For the first time since him turning up I was actually grateful for Aiden in that moment.

I turn back to Matt again, he's sitting on the sofa, his knee is bouncing up and down a mile a minute. He's making me nervous just looking at him. I move to sit next to him again, pressing my hand on to his knee. The bouncing stops at least however, the nervous energy is palpable. The knock on the door starts him back to vibrating mess again.

I move to the door and open it to a short, bearded man. His blue eyes are framed with wrinkles but its his grip that surprises me. For a short guy he has a firm handshake and seems to manage to fill the lounge with his presence. He moves towards Matt and I stop as I watch Matt relax slightly into his touch. I stab of envy hits me, I want to be able to bring that kind of calm to Matt; the way this man does. Drew presses a hand onto Matt's shoulder, crouching down in front of him, maintaining eye contact as they murmur together. Drew draws away with a nod and he moves back across the room towards me.

"You ready for this son? Matthew's gonna need you here for this. You good?"

His Texas drawl is oddly comforting and with a deep breath I nod. I can do this, for Matt I can do this.

We both move over the sofa where Matt is sitting, as we move around the sofa and I see that Matt has his eyes closed. Drew moves to stand beside him again, touching his arm lightly to get his attention again. Matt's eyes flicker open, he blinks a few times before turning towards Drew.

Drew draws Matt to lay over his knees – we had previously discussed having Matt bend over the sofa however, Matt had flat out refused. With careful coaxing he had muttered that that was how his dad used to belt him. It would bring back memories and so we were left in the end with the over-the-knee technique.

Drew moved to push down Matt's sweatpants and boxers and with that he started. Drew didn't pull his hits by half – 10 hits in and Matt's ass was redder than the fire truck itself. To give him credit though – the hits sounded hard and looked painful however, Matt didn't squirm, he didn't try to stop Drew and he didn't cry out.

Until the 20th hit – that's when I heard it. A small choked back sob – I unfroze from my position hovering by the couch and moved around the coffee table to be near Matt's head instead. With another cry, I move to grab Matt's hand in mine and squeeze it hard. He grips down as the spanking continues and I pray that this would be over soon. It was what Matt needed, discussing it over the past three days had made that very clear, however, seeing Matt hurt was hurting me. My stomach was twisting at seeing Matt hurt and not being able to stop it. It had been the same with Liv at the start of the relationship. Hurting someone never came naturally to me – it really was a good job that Liv wasn't much of a masochist!

I lost track of the hits but soon they stopped. Drew moved to pull Matt's sweatpants up and moved him so that he was sitting upright again – during this time he didn't let go of my hand. I moved to sit next to him on the couch and he dropped his head to settle on my shoulder. His eyes fluttered slightly as I watched him out of my peripheral vision.

Drew moved to crouch down again in front of him, turning Matt's head with a finger so that he could make eye contact with him.

"You okay?"

Matt nods, his mouth opens to say something but then falls closed again in the next second. It seems to satisfy Drew as he stands and turns towards me,

"I'll let myself out – you take care of your boy okay? Give me a call if you need anything in the future."

I nod and with that the door shuts down the hall and we are alone. I feel Matt shift beside me and it occurs to me that the hard couch is probably harse on his freshly spanked butt. I tug him upwards and half pull, half drag him towards the bedroom.

Once there, I pull his hoodie over his head and push the sweatpants down his legs before pushing him towards the bed. I crawl in beside him and pull his stiff form over so that he is facing me.

 **Matt's POV**

Memories of all kinds are banging around in my head – bad memories from my childhood, early memories of scenes with Drew, firehouse memories, Kelly and Liv memories. I barely register my butt hitting the soft mattress or the sting of pain that comes with it. I lay still – waiting for the figure to leave. Waiting for the darkness and the pain to overwhelm me.

Then the bed dips beside me and I tense. Waiting for the next attack – waiting for the fists to fall. Yet none come as I am tugged to turn over and pressed into a warm chest. It is then that the scent hits me – a scent that is so uniquely Kelly that I move closer to the chest to be swamped more in it. It is a scent that I associate with a lot of things – firetrucks, officer quarters, the apartment but most importantly home.

It is then that the murmured words filter through, as I feel Kelly pull me even tighter against him and a hand start to run up and down my back.

"You're okay. You're safe. You're home. I love you. You're okay. We forgive you. You are home."

Like a mantra the steady stream of words take over me. They dislodge something in me – something that I kept under wraps during the punishment. Sobs suddenly overtake me and I start to shake. Tears stream down my face and pool on the chest below, ugly heaving sobs spill out of my mouth. I cry and cry until there are no more tears and I am just dry heaving. All through a hand is still running up and down my back and the words never falter.

We are pressed face to chest as sleep overtakes me and I let it. I know that I'm safe in Kelly's arms. I feel okay again – for the first time since the Incident.

Thanks for reading and look out for the next chapter. I have a feeling that Aiden is going to be more trouble than he first appears. Maybe it is time for our two firefighters to get jealous!

As ever leave me a review or a comment and please check out any of my other stories from my profile.


	9. Chapter 8

_The warnings: this story will contain spanking of an adult, BSDM theme, polyamourous relationship between three people._

 _No copyright is intended._

 _Enjoy_

 _K xx_

 **Olivia's POV**

Blissful silence rains through the firehouse – after a few manic days everyone was glad of a calm and quiet shift for a change. With the bitter cold of Chicago's winter settling in for good, Squad had even migrated inside to bag a table over in the corner rather than be out on the apparatus floor like usual. With more bodies hovering inside the house than usual, along with a back log of reports and lieutenant paperwork that was keeping Kelly and Matt chained to their desks in their respective quarters, I had successfully managed to avoid talking to either of them most of the shift thus far.

The white noise of the television, pens on paper and the occasional sigh that always accompanies paperwork blunt the silence of the house. That being said when Hermann breaks the silence it causes me to jump and my pen skitters through two sentences of my report.

"What no messages from lover boy today Liv?"

" _Shit!_ What? Who?"

I stare at the line across my report and try to work out whether Matt is gonna make me re-write the whole thing for that one line or whether I can get away with it. Before I can decide Hermann's next sentence stops me short,

"Your boy Aiden. You couldn't go two minutes last shift without a text from him. You two had a lover's quarrel?"

"We're not together!"

My words trip over his in my haste to try and squash this rumour before it starts – just what I need right now is for Casey and Severide to hear via gossipers that me and Aiden are a thing.

"Aiden's just busy. I'm busy."

My response is fast and more aggressive than I had intended. As a hurt look flits across Hermann's face, I quickly push out of my seat and move out of the room. I push into the bathroom before laying my head back against the tiled wall and trying to breath deeply. I hear the door go and shut my eyes hoping that whoever it is will go away and leave me be.

It's then that I feel a hand on my arm, I open my eyes to see the compassion-filled brown eyes of Dawson looking back.

"Don't worry about Hermann. No-one will believe a word he says anyway."

I nod slightly, the statement is true but doesn't settle me any less. The last thing I need is for rumour about my love life to be circulating around the house.

"You need to talk about it?"

I open my mouth, but then close it again. I don't even know how to begin that sentence. I shake my head,

"Nah, I'm good. Just not feeling so good today ya know"

It's an excuse and flimsy at best but Dawson nods anyway and moves backwards towards the door, her hand is on the handle when she turns back.

"You and Matt are doing well at hiding it you know."

I frown, "Your relationship" She clarifies a few moments later,

"We're not… I mean… You'd be okay with it if we were?"

I let my sentence trail off not agreeing or disagreeing with what me and Matt are,

"Yeah – you make him happy Liv. He deserves that; you both do."

With a flash of a smile, she walks out.

I turn to look at myself in the mirror – do I? Do I deserve happiness? It sure didn't feel like it right now.

I breath and let the events of last night come rushing back in…

 **12 Hours Before**

The street light from the corner of the road casts a shadow slightly across the doorway of my apartment as I stumble up to it. I fumble in my bag for my keys, brushing past my purse. The wind whistles around me, making me shiver slightly as I desperately try and locate my keys again. I manage to curl my hand around them just as I hear footsteps behind me. I try and breath, telling myself that they are gonna walk right past the gate and along down the road. It's then that I realise that the street is entirely too quiet and I'm entirely too alone. Just as this thought hits me, the gate behind me squeaks. I feel my breathing pick up to almost hyperventilating, and I desperately try and find the lock on the door in front of me to get inside to safety and the footsteps keep getting closer. As my keys bounce off of the smooth door in front of me, I realise that the footsteps are gonna get to me before I get inside. The thought of screaming comes to mind – but at this time of night both Matt and Kell are gonna be in a dead sleep. By the time that they awake and get down here… well it's gonna be too late. I turn my keys in my hand, pressing one jagged side out between my fingers as a makeshift knuckle as I turn. My heart is thumping loud in my chest as I see the black outline of a man coming up the front path. The shadows obscure the figure's face from view, I move ready to hit out at him as he comes in to range. Just as I tense to swing, my eyes adjust to the lack of light outside and I manage to focus on his face.

"Aiden!"

The breath of relief at the familiar face is blinding. I slump backwards against the door, pressing one hand to my chest. I then realise my keys are still sticking out between my fingers and flick them back into the palm of my hand.

"You almost gave me a heart attack! I left you at the bar on Lawrence."

"Livy! Livy, Olivia, O!"

His voice is strangely sing-songy and the slight slur in his voice has deepened to a point where his words are mashing together as one now. His smile isn't reaching his eyes and it is looking more demented than his usual easy smirk. A small sliver of fear rises, but I resolutely push it down again. This is Aiden – my best friend, he's not dangerous; just drunk off his ass. He keeps moving towards me though and I feel myself unconsciously begin to lean further away. Despite his size and strength, I had never felt intimidated or the least bit threatened by Aiden… until now.

He looms over me and a panic begins to settles in my stomach as the door handle hits the small of my back. I push the panic down - this is Aiden, what is the worst that he is going to do? He's probably just come to make sure that I get in okay.

One of Aiden's hands settles on the door right beside my head effectively caging me in with his body. The doorway is now casting a shadow over my friend's face, causing his eyes to be obscured and go to black.

"Aiden? "

My voice waivers slightly, trailing off at the end in a silent question as he moves his head closer to mine until his face is just a few millimetres away from mine. His breath reeks of vodka and his dank breath hits my cheek as he keeps his head close to me.

I feel his eyes on me for a second and I move to place a hand on his chest. I'm trying to push him away from me slightly and open my mouth to tell him to back off when his other hand grabs the side of my face and his lips crash into mine - hard.

 **Fast Forward 12 Hours**

After vomiting what was left of my breakfast up in the bathroom, I move back outwards and in to the common room again. Grabbing a coffee to try and wash the taste of puke out of my mouth. I move to try and focus again on my report in front of me on the table – I've been on the same report for the last two hours yet I'm barely half way through it. I shake my head slightly, trying to get my attention to focus on the words. Taking a swig of my coffee, I look up to find Hermann's eyes on me,

"I'm just ribbin' ya kid. You and Aiden just seem tight – ya know?"

I nod – I did know. Me and Aiden had always had a tight friendship – sharing everything with each other. He had been my rock for so long, the only thing that had kept me going through my bout of depression when I was 16. He had been the only reason I hadn't OD'ed on pills; he had been the driving force behind me when I had enrolled at the Academy. He had been my everything for so long that the idea of not having him in my life was practically impossible.

I loved Kelly and Matt more than anything – the thing was I had loved Aiden too. I couldn't picture my life without Aiden in it. He was such a big part of me – yet I couldn't picture myself with him in my life after last night. Confusion swirled in my mind causing my stomach to clench again. I just wanted to go back to bed and never get out of it again.

My avoidance abilities had served me well for most of our 24-hour shift however, after 18 hours, my talents had worn thin on the ground – avoiding the bunk room had been hard yet not impossible. It had grown harder and harder as the night wore on and now it seemed my talents had failed me.

"Liv!"

I turn back towards the Officer's Quarters, moving across the bunk room to push Kelly's door open a little bit more and lean against the door frame.

"You ignoring me? I've texted you like 10 times today?"

I move my gaze to my phone as I pull it out of my pocket before pressing the home button – it's a charade. I knew the phone was on silent and I knew because I had been avoiding looking at it all day. I see the 83 new messages and counting… 85 as two more ping into my inbox - a reminder as to the reason my phone had been on silent for the past 24 hours. I pull my gaze away from the ever multiply messages and shove the phone away before turning to where Kelly was sitting.

"Ah - it's on silent, sorry. You need anything?"

I try to force a smile on my face, hoping to escape this conversation before Matt appears as well.

"Just haven't seen you much today - just wanted to check you were okay love? You left pretty early this morning."

I hum and nod,

"Just very busy today"

I utter the sentence as I turn slightly away. I move out of the door again avoiding his eyes. Moving across the bunk room I keep my head down but can still feel his eyes burning on my back and they cause tears to burn the corners of my eyes.

Out of sight, I bolt for the locker room again, shutting myself in a shower stall before curling downwards in to a ball on the cold floor and feel the tears start to run down my cheeks. The cold seeps through my hoodie and into my bones. Still I lay there, letting myself start to shiver.

I sob for well over 20 minutes before pulling myself up. I thrown water on my face, scrubbing away the tear marks before heading back into the bunk room and pulling my blanket over me – willing sleep to make the rest of the shift short.

I feel a body move over me, but keep my breaths even and my eyes closed. His breath hits my face and I feel his eyes on my face, taking in my red puffy eyes.

"Liv? Baby – you okay?"

His voice is soft, so soft I can't tell which of them it is. I don't reply though and a light kiss is pressed on my temple before he stands up and moves away. The cologne and stubble give Kelly away as the kisser and a few minutes later another kiss is pressed on my cheek as Matt moves past the bed. He doesn't linger like Kelly did, too focused on what tasks he still has to do.

I turn my body to face the wall and pressing my head in to the pillow, let more tears fall. Why did love hurt so much?

 **Matt's POV**

"She's acting weird - have you seen her today? Got more than three words out of her?"

I pull my shirt over my head before slamming my locker door shut and turning to face Kelly.

"She's busy - we all have. Why are you not changed? Come on – I want to be home by Thanksgiving!"

My lovely ideas of going back to the apartment and having a nice breakfast with Kelly and Liv are slowly being dashed as Kelly doesn't seem to move towards his locker to start getting changed out of his uniform. He leans forward, elbows on knees,

"I've text her a million times and she hasn't answered a single one."

"You said yourself, her phone is on silent and she's busy doing paperwork."

"We talked earlier, she wouldn't even look me in the eyes Matt!"

"You're over-reacting. It's been a long day and she was out last night with Aiden. She's probably just tired"

"She's been crying – her eyes have been red-rimmed for most of the day!"

"Again, it's been a long day for all of us. Breath…. And for god sake, would you get changed!"

Just as I'm talking Liv's phone lights up, lighting the inside of her bag up. It catches Kelly's attention more than my sensible words are. I drop my bag on to the floor, just as Kelly leans down and plucks her phone out of her bag. He turns it and we see Aiden's caller ID. I tense slightly and with my silence, Kelly moves, swiping the decline button on the call. I see his fingers move,

"Wait. Kelly, we aren't the type of people to look through her phone."

He ignores my hiss completely and unlocks her phone.

"There are 182 messages on here Matt… Jesus 54 missed calls - all from Aiden."

He looks up at me,

"Still think nothing odd is going on? - she hasn't responded to him all day. Something's off about this Matt – I know it!"

He moves to scroll up the line of texts,

"Severide – put it down. Please! It's probably nothi…"

My words trail off as I see his shoulders tense,

"Kelly?"

He passes the phone to me and points for me to see one text that makes my blood run cold -

 _"I know that that kiss meant something to you too. You can't fake chemistry like that Ollie."_

 **Olivia's POV**

Finally, the shift had ended – it had seemed to take forever. I turn in to the locker room and spot Matt and Kelly by their lockers. I pull in a deep breath and take a step towards them as Matt turns around.

In his hand is my phone, the screen alight and on. My breath stops in my chest, my heart speeds up ten times and my gaze focus on the words on the screen. The words that seem so damning now in the cold clear light of the morning.

It's then that I really see their faces – Matt's is hurt and Kelly's is a mixture of anger and disbelief. I feel my head drop to avoid their gazes and I look at the tiles beneath my feet. Trying to make myself invisible and trying to find the best explanation for this. Nothing comes.


	10. Chapter 9

_The warnings: this story will contain spanking of an adult, BSDM theme, polyamourous relationship between three people._

 _No copyright is intended._

 _Enjoy_

 _K xx_

 **Olivia's POV**

 _"Livy! Livy, Olivia, O!"_

 _Aiden steps towards me, caging me against the door with his hands. The doorknob I pressing into the small of my back; Aiden's warm breath is hitting my cheek. I'm pressing my hand on my chest and his face is getting closer to mine…_

With a start I wake. The room is still, snoring comes from my left, a bed spring squeaks as someone turns over; then silence rains again. I press my eyes closed for the third time in the last few hours, trying desperately to sink into a dreamless sleep.

Yet the minute my eyes close and my body begins to relax, I feel it. The smell of vodka comes to me and a warm breath brushes over my cheek. I jump, sitting up quickly, eyes darting around. Capp shifts in his bed yet no-one is near me, leaning over me or otherwise. Coffee, I decide – that was what was going to get me through the rest of this shift. Sleep was going to have to wait until I got home – the bottle of sleeping pills on my bedside table comes to mind. I nod to myself – that seemed like a better idea. I pause as I pass the Lieutenant's Quarters, watching as the light filtering in through the windows, illuminates Kelly's face for a minute – it was so relaxed, so unlike the last time we had been face to face.

" _Care to explain that text- actually don't bother. The text is pretty self-explanatory. How about when you were going to tell us that you kissed Aiden last night"_

 _Kelly's keys hit the table in the hallway, skittering across it, falling off the other side to the floor with a bang. His bag is chucked inside of the bedroom door as he turns. I'm cornered in the hallway – Matt in front of me still taking off his boots, Kelly behind pressing the front door closed._

" _Come on! When were we gonna find out?!"_

 _Kelly's voice becomes louder, echoing around the small hallway. His muscles bulge as he gestures wildly to accompany his yelling. Jaw locked, feet shoulder width apart and his eyebrows pulling together in rage, his fury is palpable. His soft, blue eyes that usually hold so much warmth and light have turned to hard, cold flints in his face, causing me to cower away from his gaze, resting my gaze instead at the floor._

A cold shift of air pulls me out of my memory and back to the present. Pulling my hoodie further around me I force myself to walk away and into the kitchen.

The scalding hot coffee burns my throat as I swallow, but it doesn't seem to really register. I move to the sofa, tucking the cup to my breastbone, I pull my feet underneath me, curling into a ball, letting my back rest against the arm of the sofa as my mind drifts again.

 _The key code for my old apartment block was still the same after all of these months, the light in the stairwell still flickered and the door to my apartment still squeaked loudly. I push the door shut and lean my head against the wood, trying to stop the tears from streaming down my face again – I had cried so much today that I wasn't sure that there was anything left in me to cry yet as I turned to survey my old apartment, they ran down my face to plop to the lino floor beneath my feet._

 _I hadn't been back here since I had moved in with Matt and Kelly almost a year ago. With their apartment furnished, all of my furniture had stayed here – I had said that I was going to sell this place – yet something had always held me back. Today I was glad that this place was still mine. I flick the light switch and curse – no electricity. Great! I had shut off all of the services when I had moved out._

" _What do you want? Who do you want Olivia? You need to figure it out!"_

 _Kelly's words echoed in my ears as I survey what is left of my old apartment, my old life. I had had no words then for either of them and even now – an hour later still no words came. I didn't know any more._

 _Then Matt's even crueller words seemed to hover,_

" _Maybe we should just take a break for a bit, from us. Just until you know."_

 _Anger welled up at those words, words that had gone around and round in my head for the past hour. All of my rage exploded and I slam my hand against the wall, again and again and again, not sure if I'm trying to damage the wall, Aiden or myself in the process. Pain ricochets through my knuckles and down my arm until I can no longer keep hitting and, cradling my arm, I slide down the wall to curl on the ground. I wait for the tears to start to run down my face again yet this time none come. Maybe I had cried all of them out, I just felt hollow, empty and useless as I slid to lay my cheek on the floor, letting the cold seep into my cheek and shoulder._

 **Matt's POV**

The bell echoes around the house in a shrill scream.

"Truck 81, Squad 3, Ambulance 61, motor vehicle accident, 951 West Brom"

I force my body of the bed and try to shake the sleep out of my head and focus my brain. I join the crowd of half-awake people as we head for the trucks. Heading through the corridor and out on to the apparatus floor, I turn slightly and see her. Liv is curled in a ball on the sofa in the mess room. Staring into space, she shows no signs of moving at all. A growl of irritation come from my throat as I switch courses and head towards her – this is not the first time these past few shifts that she has been totally out of it and not heard the bells.

"Rhodes!"

I snap at her from the mess room doorway, yet she doesn't stir from her position. Coffee cup still curled in her hard, eyes focused, unseeing, on the wall in front of her. I step closer, talk louder,

"RHODES!"

Liv jumps hard. Coffee sloshes over the side of her mug and down her hand and trousers. Her eyes dart to mine and it's then that I see the flash of fear and sadness. I pause trying to decipher the same yet then the wall closes back down again. Shutting me out again for the millionth time.

"Bell went ages ago - Truck NOW!"

Without another word I turn and move towards the truck. I hear the bang as the coffee cup is set on the table and hurried footsteps jogging behind me out on the to apparatus floor. My eyes catch Hermann's as I swing up and into the truck's passenger seat. He raises an eyebrow with a look that says Rhodes is late again, a look that says her head isn't in the game, a look that says you need to do something about this before someone gets hurt. I nod slightly at him – acknowledging it all at once.

It is only when the truck is moving that I turn over Oliva's appearance in my head. It had been a while since I had seen Olivia up close – she had taken to avoiding me and Kelly as much as humanly possible when you work 24 hour shifts together. Dark circles ringed her bloodshot eyes, she had taken to wearing a CFD hoodie that looked at least two sizes too big for her and she seemed gaunter than she used to. I turned to join in the banter in the back and Olivia again caught my eye. Huddled in the corner of the truck, her head was turned to look out of the window and again that misty no-really-seeing glaze was over her eyes. She didn't attempt to join in the conversation like she once would have, settling for curled into the window of the truck. Turning back to watch the streets flash past my mind wanders;

" _Do you love him?"_

 _"I love both of you"_

 _"That's not what I asked! Do you love Aiden?"_

 _It's that one question that echoes through the apartment, killing of the yelling from Kelly and the deadly silence from Liv. The whole place stands still for a second, Liv shifts from foot to foot, eyes darting everywhere but at us. I take a step forward from where I have been standing for the past 30 minutes of this argument; between an angry Kelly and a silent Liv. I move to block her view of Kel, standing in arms' length of her now. Her eyes move to my face and I see anguish, then nothing. She pulls a wall down between her feelings and me; blocking me out. I reach an arm out to her, trying to comfort myself more than her. After all we have been through, this wasn't how I wanted the relationship to end._

" _I…I.."_

 _The broken sentence pierces my heart as I move backwards again, resuming my place by the couch. I dart a glance at Kelly and see tears welling in his eyes._

" _Maybe we should take a break from us, just for a bit. Just until you know."_

 _The words, meant to try and defuse the situation, caused a small cry to emit from Liv – the first sound she had made since we had come home. With that, she moves. Stumbling across the apartment and down the hall._

" _LIV!"_

 _Kelly is the first to move as I call out. He darts around the couch and runs towards the hallway. He is barely in the hallway at all when the door bangs shut. She doesn't have a bag or a coat, I run numbly after Kelly as he rips open the apartment door to try and catch up to her. Our footfalls echo loudly around the stairwell as we run. I catch up with Kelly as he hits the sidewalk outside._

 _The snow seeped into the bottom of my socks as we stand on the sidewalk, our stares fixed on the gap on the opposite sidewalk; the gap that had held Liv's car just half an hour ago._

I pulled my attention away from my memory as we reached the accident site, turning instead to the scene unfolding in front of us.

 **Olivia's POV**

"Time to go to work"

Hermann's voice startled me awake from my half-asleep daze that I was in. I follow him out of the truck, stumbling slightly on the bottom step, nearly knocking into him. I feel hands on my arms steading me, but I didn't turn to thank him anymore. I knew what I would see – contempt at my inability to even go down some steps. Hermann's patience for me had run out well over a week ago and he was no longer trying to hide his feelings on my inability to keep my focus. It wasn't like I wasn't trying – I was. I tried to keep my focus on what was happening, keep up with everyone else, yet my body seemed to do the opposite. Even now, I was still by the truck as everyone else was already heading towards the wrecked car lying on its roof in the middle of the street. Shaking my head, I jog to catch up with the back of the group, by the time I get there Kelly is already crouched down trying to talk to the man pinned in the driver's seat,

"Stephen, can you move your legs at all?"

"No, there's trapped. My wife, Caroline – is she okay?"

Severide flicks a look back to Casey, the look says it all – they need to move and they need to move now.

"Hang tight okay, we're gonna get you both out. Just try and stay very still."

Severide stands and moves backs towards us and out of the earshot of the man,

"Gas tank is punctured and leaking into the main cab, we're gonna have to get him out quick before the car goes up. Wife's unconscious, bad gash to the side of her head and he is pinned in pretty bad by the steering column."

"Okay – Squad, get the driver out, Truck, control that fire at the back of the car and try to get the passenger."

If the Chief's orders were fast, then the Lieutenants were quicker, rolling out of their mouths like gunfire.

"Otis, Dawson get the extinguishers – try and control the fire at the back of the car as much as possible. We can't let that fire get to the gas pooling in the main cab. Hermann, Mouch get cribbing around the front sides of the car to stabilise it, Rhodes, the jaws. You and me are gonna get the passenger out."

"Cruz, you, me and Capp are gonna get the driver out of the car. Capp, get the Joist so we can get that steering column off of the driver's legs. Tony – assist Casey and Rhodes. Cruz, let's that driver's side door open!"

Severide and Cruz moved to the other side of the car and the sound of the halagan hitting the side of the car echoes around the quiet street. I turn towards the truck and sigh internally as the rest of Truck are already 5 feet in front of me. As I reach the truck and pull open one of the compartments to grab the jaws, Hermann's voice abruptly stops talking and see him in my peripheral vision move away from Casey to grab some cribbing with Mouch. The implication isn't lost – he was talking about me, actually more likely moaning about me to Casey again. I push down the wave of rage and duck my head, pretending I hadn't noticed.

I stare at the compartment I had just opened – the jaws weren't in there. I try and rack my brain for where they would have been moved to yet my memories remained fuzzy, nothing stood out as to where we would have moved them last time we had cleaned the truck.

"Compartment at the end – we moved them last week."

Dawson's words were whispered to me as she grabbed one of the fire extinguishers out and turned to move backwards to the scene. I smile at her, muttering a thanks before moving to grab the jaws.

"RHODES – hurry up"

I grab the jaws and turn to run back towards the scene. He snatches the jaws off of me and steps in front of me to shove them into the dented door jam. I step back and off to the side out of his way. With a groan, the door gives.

 **Kelly POV**

"Strike. Strike. Strike."

With a sharp tug and a loud bang, the door in front of me and Cruz gives way. I turn, searching for Capp and the joist so that we could try and extricate the driver, when my gaze lands on Olivia. She was hovering by one of the compartments of the Truck, just staring at the contents, unmoving. I had warned myself off of watching her since the argument, trying to keep our distance, give her time to think. She seemed so…fragile all of a sudden – breakable; like the next strong gust of wind would blow her over.

"Lieutenant?"

Capp's voice penetrated my thoughts and I shake myself. Work! Work needed to be done – musings about Olivia could wait until later.

Just as we manage to get the joist under the steering column, I hear Casey yelling. I spare a glance upwards in time to see Casey wrench the jaws from Olivia and step in front of her. It's then that I see the hurt that flashes over her face before she hardens her features and steps back to hover, waiting for something to do. I move to grab the driver and it's then that I see the look exchanged between Hermann and Mouch at the front of the car. It turns my stomach slightly.

As the two ambulances rush away from the scene and the gear is packed back in the trucks, I swing back into the passenger seat of the Squad truck. Turning to check that the doors were shut, I catch a glimpse of Truck 81 as it pulls past. The flash of a white face, eyes closed, hand pressed to her temple is haunting as the truck picks up speed to return to the house.

 **Olivia POV**

My alarm clock buzzes for the 10th time in the last hour. I roll over and look at the time. With a sigh I flop backwards on the bed, groaning. I have about 20 minutes before shift starts – I should have left 10 minutes ago yet I am still not dressed or anywhere near my car. A heaviness has settled over my body, my limbs refuse to move and sleep tugs at my eyelids. I go to move, grabbing my phone off of the side table and then stop. The images dance in front of my eyes – Casey's mad face last call; the side of Kelly's face as he refuses to even look at me; the Chief's resigned face as he asks again if everything is alright even though he knows it's not; Brett's inability to look me in the eye but most of all; Hermann's disapproving and irate face.

Last shift had gone so slowly – with my inability to sleep and the house suddenly feeling so much less friendly than it had before, my willingness to hustle and get to shift this morning had waned in the past two days off to non-existent.

"Useless… Nothing…Unable to do simple tasks… they hate you…"

That little voice in the back of my head chanted. I press my eyes closed for a minute and another voice joined in.

"Livy, Livy…" Aiden's voice chanted too. I pressed both hands to my forehead in frustration. Anger surge until I grabbed the bottle of sleeping pills off of my dresser, popped two and crawled back under my duvet again.

Messages caused my phone to light up, again and again; then the trill of my house phone also joined in the party. Yet, wrapped in my duvet, dead to the world on pills I didn't hear them. For once the world was quiet to me – blissful darkness took me away from the hell that I had been living for the past few weeks. I only wished that the darkness could be permeant now.

 **Matt's POV**

I check my phone for the 10th time in the last 10 minutes – still no reply. My message is sitting on my phone blinking away. Roll call drags on and still no sign of Olivia anywhere. She knew she was on shift today – where is she?

I quietly slip out into the hall and press the call button. The dialling tone beeps on and on and on until with a click I hear her voice.

"Liv?"

My heart sinks as her voicemail message starts up

"Hello, Olivia speaking… Just kidding it's my voicemail. Leave me a message and I'll get back to you."

I swear under my breath, tell her to call me when she gets the message and disconnect the call. Entering the roll call again, I feel Kelly settle on the wall next to me.

"Voicemail again."

I mutter to him before turning my attention back to the Chief. He dismisses us and we drift off into the dining room in search of coffee. Talking immediately starts and the hot topic for today was where Olivia was? I see Hermann out of the corner of my eye rolling his eyes at Liv's absence.

I raise an eyebrow at Kelly and he nods slightly before pulling his mobile out of his pocket and drifts out towards the control room, dialling as he walks.

Two minutes he re-enters, catching my eye and shaking his head as well. He's had no luck either. Worry is starting to turn my stomach as time ticks on and no word had come.

It takes another ten minutes before Connie called me and Severide to the Chief's office. The door shuts behind us and we turn to the Chief.

"Do we have any word from Rhodes at all?"

I flash a look at Severide before speaking,

"None so far… I'm sure that there is a good excuse."

"We've both left a few messages. No answer yet."

Boden leans backwards staring at us before spreading his hands,

"There better be. I have put in for a relief man on Truck. He'll be here in the next hour or so but until them we are one man short."

I nod before moving, pulling open the office door and just walking away. I don't hear whether Kelly is behind me or what is said after. I brush off Mouch and Hermann as I pass the dining room with a shake of my head before I push in to my quarters and sink down on to my bed, pressing my head into my hands.

 **Kelly POV**

Matt is moving like a zombie as he almost runs away from the Chief's office. I follow at a more sedate pace. I push into Matt's quarters and sink down on the bed beside him.

I compulsively check my phone again yet still nothing. The messages sit, staring back at me, delivered but not seen. I push down the fear – her phone battery was probably dead and she was on her way now. I turn to look at Matt and see the same fear reflected in his eyes. Just because we had taken a break didn't mean that the feelings had been turned off just like that – our protective streak and love for Liv hadn't decreased over the time apart. I glance back at my phone and my mind wanders…

 _Seen_

 _That little word had taunted me for days – every message sent had been delivered, seen and then ignored. After Liv had left the apartment, we had called, texted, gone around and even posted a letter. Yet she continued to shut us out. Calls and texts were ignored, we had knocked until our hands had bleed and had talked to the door until her neighbour had come out and threatened to call the police on us. It had been two days and we had looked forward to shift in the attempt that we would see Liv and at least be able to talk to her._

 _She had appeared on shift just as roll call had started and had managed to avoid both of us for half of the shift/ However, she had been unable to avoid us forever. I had managed to grab her as she had come off of the apparatus floor and pulled her aside._

" _Are you okay? We have been trying to get hold of you…"_

 _She turned, yanking her arm out of my grip and her gaze was hard as she interrupted me,_

" _This is what you wanted. I'm not talking about this. I have to get back to shift Lieutenant."_

 _With that, she was out of the door leaving me alone._

" _Let her have some space. She'll come around."_

 _Matt is preoccupied with Reports as I lay on his bed moaning at him, I could tell that he was placating me at best. I grab the pillow from behind my head and chuck it at the back of his, laughing. He laughs too before putting his pen down and turns._

 _Suddenly it strikes me – we're in the same position as we were around a year ago discussing Olivia and BDSM. My laughter dies in my throat and I see the happiness drain out of Matt too. Matt glanced at the bunk room before moving to the bed. I sit up as Casey wraps an arm around me, pulling me into a hug…_

A kiss is pressed on the side of my neck and jogs me out of my memory and back into the moment. Pushing the phone back into my pocket, I turn to Casey and see the worry reflected in his eyes.

"It's gonna be fine. There's gotta be a good explanation. She wouldn't just blow off shift – she loves this job."

I'm not sure if I'm trying to convince Matt or myself in the end.

 **Olivia's POV**

I wake up groggy – struggling to pry my eyes open and struggling even more to drag my body out of bed. I drag myself into the kitchen and, grabbing a cup of coffee, sit at the table. I felt drained, each breath feeling like an effort – an exhausting effort that I really didn't want to continue with. As tears filled my eyes, I thought about reaching out to someone, anyone. Yet as names filled my head, each was dismissed, their faces contorting in disgust in my imagination at me. I was hopeless; unable to even manage to do my job properly – if the ever-patient Hermann had given up on me, then everyone else would have done a long time ago. All of this was my fault, I had let Aiden in, trusted him and broken up my relationship.

I drifted into the bedroom again. Desperately seeking anything that was going to help this aching empty feeling that had returned to my body like an addict to alcohol. It was then that I spotted the bottle of sleeping pills on the side. Picking them up I unscrewed the lid and looked inside – it was half full. I sank down on to the bed and tipped– 25 or so of white pills filled my hand. One movement, that was all it would take. On movement and all of this would be over. All of the hurt, all of the feelings, all of the thoughts. The house would be happier – they would get someone assigned that would be able to do the job better than me.

Just as I raise my hand to my mouth, Chief Boden's voice filled the apartment. I jerk slightly and the pills roll out of my palm and on to the floor and bed. I don't move to pick them up.

"This is a message for Olivia Rhodes – it is Chief Boden. I am sure that you are aware that you should have been on shift today. If you had a problem with the shift you should have called me or CFD to change shifts. You left us a man down and that is unacceptable behaviour. Whatever is going on in your life – it should NEVER affect your work! If you are not in next shift, I have no choice but to pink slip you and report you. I look forward to seeing you next shift Olivia."

As the apartment falls silent, I look down at the pills scattered across the floor and the bottle on the side. Tears fall down my cheeks, dripping off of my chin and on to my knees as my arms wrap around my middle. I had worked too hard to lose my badge – blood, sweat and tears had gone into getting it and it had been the best achievement of my life. To give it in now would break me. I pulled open my bedside draw and pulled out the badge. Holding it in my hand I felt a strength flow through me. Clenching my hand, I felt the edges of the badge cut into my palm. I was strong. I had fought all the way through the Academy; I had fought to get that badge; I had fought to get to Firehouse 51; I had fought Depression once and I was going to fight this again. One thing that I knew from last time – you had to slay your demons. This demon had the face of Aiden and he was going down.

With that thought I was moving. Jeans and a tank top were shoved on, keys grabbed and I was moving with purpose and speed for the first time in the last month. I hail a cab and as it drives away from the curb I start to let pieces of THAT night start to filter in.

Aiden's mouth on mine, the doorknob pushing into my back, the feeling of his shirt as I tried to push him away. But the thing that came back the most was the fear – fear as his hand kept me pined against the door; as he loomed over me, shadows blacking out his face.

I stepped out of the cab, took a breath, walked through the doors and walked up to the desk. I was shaking in fear but it was my badge clenched in my fist that caused the words to come out of my mouth finally,

"I'd like to report a rape please"


End file.
